Right Where I Needed to be

The Guilt We Share

"Hey, Midoriya." Endeavor greeted with a sad smile. "Are you here alone?" It was one of the rare times his quirk was active.

"Yeah. I don't think there will be any more killings until Monoma returns. Plus, I don't care too much if I run into the U.A. Killer." I shrugged.

"I'm sure your husband does." He frowned.

"You're not wrong, but it might be easier than watching me deteriorate." I'm only going to grow more sick. When I can hardly move or breathe, I know it's going to break his heart.

"Are you planning on dying to the U.A. Killer?" Endeavor asked with a cocked brow. I haven't told anybody or said it out loud, but I am.

"I'm not opposed to it." I shrugged. "The only reason I'm not is because of Kacchan. The last time we got too close, he killed two people and threatened to kill Kacchan. I don't want anybody else to die."

"You'd have to go rogue." He bent down and traced his hand over Todoroki's headstone. "You already have limited time with your husband and friends. Do you really want to waste it?" I know he disapproves, but I don't know what else to do.

"If we don't do something, everyone else is going to die." I sighed. "I don't want to leave this world knowing that there was something else I could have done."

Endeavor was silent for a moment as he looked across the graves of my classmates. Less than a year ago, none of them were here. This part of the cemetery was completely empty.

"I won't tell you what to do," he started with a heavy sigh. "I will tell you that I wish I had more time with Shoto. I wish I got to do all the things I've ever wanted to do with him. I wish I got to watch him get married one day and watch him and Tenya adopt kids. Life is too short already. There's no reason for anyone to rush to their deathbed, including you."

"I get that." I frowned. I wish everyone in this cemetery had more time. "However, is my life worth everyone else's?"

"Yes and no. One life is not equal to another. You do not need to put yourself in danger, especially if your husband has already been threatened. If you want to start working alone, you'll lose everything much faster."

He wasn't wrong, but he wasn't right either. I would rather die tomorrow and everyone else lives a full life. This was a big decision, and I had to weigh the pros and cons. If I go rogue, it will give me a better chance of figuring out who the U.A. Killer is, which would also give me a chance to save everyone else. However, if I do that, I'm putting a giant target on Kacchan's back. I also won't be able to spend time with the people I love.

"How's Aizawa doing?" I need to change the subject before I spill my heart to Endeavor. I don't want him running around and telling anybody my business until I know what I'm going to do.

"He's a mess." He sighed. "He lost his husband and daughter years ago, and he just lost his son. Nezu keeps him busy at school and has forced him into therapy, so he's doing better."

"And how are you doing?" I asked quietly. On top of us killing his oldest son years ago, he just lost his youngest one.

"When I found out that Dabi was Touya, it broke me. During the war, I was hoping we could persuade him to join the right side. I wanted to save him, but I couldn't. I wish I had more time to help him and reverse all the damage I caused when he was just a kid." His voice grew quieter with every word he spoke.

"I was still repairing my relationship with Shoto when he got murdered. I knew I would never be able to repair it fully, but we were making great progress." He frowned.

"Can I ask you a question?" I sat down next to him on the ground. I felt awkward standing over his back while he was sitting on his knees.

"Go for it." He shrugged.