84. nothing's changed

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i remember the laughs at the dinner table,

eating pasta with my dad,

we used to make it together.

oh.. what fun,

but that fun turned into fear,

and the laughs turned into tears,

crying,

begging,

"please don't make me eat"

it used to be my favorite,

but only numbers repeat,

in my head,

no joy,

no fun.

just calculations from when i was young,

at the top of my class,

fearing only of failure.


nothing's changed.

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