Lacuna (Missing Part)

39

Aziyat aise keh aj say pehlay aise aziyat na sahi kabhi

Ibrahim

This place was once my favourite place. So many memories with my girl. How we used to talk here for hours. Oh what beautiful days they were. I closed my eyes and let my head rest back. She will be out here in few minutes.

How many months it has been? I don't even remember, but its been long. Way long since i saw her. It was our day. The day i saw her first time in that mall. The day she took my heart away. Its still there. In her hands and she herself doesn't know about it.

It doesn't matter how much i try. I just can't forget her. I don't think i have it in me to ever forget her. My heart loved only one women and it yearns for only one.
I know i cant get her. She is way to precious for a man like me. I can't take care of a heart. I ruined her.

And if i think about it

I am not able to take care of my wife's heart as well. I don't want to hurt her. But i just can't accept her. Why its like this ?
How can fate be so cruel?
Why did I marry her ? I knew i would never be able to accept her whole heartedly yet i just saw what my father wanted me to do and never thought about what will that girl has to go through?

My chain of thoughts stopped as i saw bunch of students coming out of her department. My eyes searching for her. Where is she ?

About ten minutes later as everyone was outside i saw glimpse of her in crowd of students. My breath hitched. She looks as beautiful as day one. Her cheekbones high and once her bubbly face has now defined jawline. Her eyes hallow as she came out bag on her shoulder and two people beside her. One i remember as her friend and other? Who is he ?

I feel my heart beat fast. Does he want my Bia? I feel like i cant breath. My bia ? Is she still mine ? Should i even call her mine ? Because last I remember i write myself as Saira's husband. It was not my choice.

Should i go to her ? Beg her for forgiveness? Yes i should

As I opened the door and came out my eyes clashed with the person i least expected.

Zainab

Her eyes sharp. A death glare. I stopped as i waited for her to come forward and ask me something

Maybe how dare i come here after ruining her best friend?

I glanced back at Anabia and saw her back towards me. She didn't recognise my car. Or maybe she didn't even glanced at it.

"I didn't expect you here " came Zainab's voice

"Neither did i" i said still glancing at bia

My heart aches. I need her.

"Eyes here ibrahim" i looked at zainab " don't do this to her, she has gone through so much she still is going through heartache" guilt is all i feel

I look down at my shoes

" i don't know whatever reason you had, she did not deserve this. I grew up with her Ibrahim. Never in my life i saw her like this. This broken. Do you know sometimes i wake up in the middle of the night by the voices of her crying? " i felt my throat tighten as she continued