Distractions

Chapter Forty: Drama and Trauma

So much chaos. So many tears. So much laughter. It's a disaster but everything everyone needs as well as things we didn't want but are necessary.

Trigger Warnings: Worry, anxiety, panic, mentions of past self harm, mentions of past near death experiences, grief, mentions of past death, burning alive (off page).

Trigger Warnings: Worry, anxiety (entire chapter)

Silky sheets and soft blankets enveloped her very being as the remnants of her dream faded away. She rolled over, eyes still closed against the faint light that managed to get past the curtains, in an attempt to find Magnus. All she found was an empty bed and chilled sheets.

She propped herself up on her elbows with a frown. Magnus was gone—again. This was the fourth morning in a row Magnus hadn't been there when she or Alec had woken up. She knew Alec would have left well before the sun was awake, maybe even after she and Magnus had fallen asleep, to handle the paperwork and drama surrounding Valentine. Had Magnus left the bed before Alec or after?

Everest carefully slipped out of the bed, shivering slightly from the difference in temperature. She checked the bathroom for Magnus, even though she knew he wouldn't be there. He wasn't. She sighed. She just wanted to understand what was going on with him so she could help him.

She grabbed her phone and a scrunchie before heading to the kitchen to start a pot of coffee. She paused in the doorway.

Magnus was sitting statue still at the dining table-vanity hybrid, a blue and white teacup held tightly in his hands. His gaze, visible through the mirror in front of Magnus, was vacant and full of a deep rooted grief.

"There you are," she said lightly as she continued walking to the kitchen. Magnus jolted slightly before she watched him smile through the mirror, though it was somewhat tense.

"Good morning," Magnus said, turning to face her.

"I'd say the same, but it looks like you haven't slept."

"Should I be insulted by that?" Magnus teased, adjusting his blue suit jacket as he stood.

"No, I love your face." Magnus smiled and stepped closer. He paused when Everest continued. "But this is like the fourth morning I've woken up to an empty bed, or a bed without you at least. Is there something bothering you?"

Magnus shook his head almost minutely and he smiled, but his eyebrows rose ever so slightly like they did whenever he was pretending to be okay. "Nothing's bothering me. I've even gotten used to your adorable little sleep rants."

She rolled her eyes fondly, one hand raising to cover the hand Magnus had on her chest. "I don't sleep rant. I just sleep talk every once in a while."

"Cupcake, you ranted about the best brand of hairspray to make a flamethrower in your sleep last week."

"No I didn't," she protested, letting herself be pulled into the kitchen towards the coffee maker. "Look, I know you well enough to know that something's going on in your head."

Magnus smiled and leaned against the counter. "Everest, I'm fine. Really."

She paused briefly in starting a pot of coffee to raise her eyebrows at him. He was fully aware of how disheveled and out of it he looked, right? He was aware that he looked like he had just gone a dozen rounds with a semi and lost, didn't he? He had to, right?