Tough & Classy

Chapter 50

Chapter 50: "And it hurts to know that someone will love me, but that someone isn't you..."

I am done making myself believe that I'm over him. I'm sick and tired of convincing myself that I could love someone else. I refuse to fool myself further into believing that his scent doesn't affect me anymore, because the truth of the matter is, it does. 

I don't want to delude myself into thinking that I can look into his eyes and tell myself that my heart no longer beats for him, because it does. In actuality, it never stopped. I realized that my feelings just got clouded for a moment for I got too busy building my dreams. 

And lastly, I can no longer deny the truth that it pains me to see him with another woman. I'm so damn jealous I want to pull him away from her.

I blinked as Sea moved forward into my line of vision. "Obvious ka na, girl."

"Sea, do you think he still cares about me? Even just a little?"

She clacked her tongue and scratched her forehead. "Paano ko ba sasagutin iyan? Dalawa lang naman kase iyan. It's either magiging hopia ka or masasaktan ka sa isasagot ko."

"Just be honest."

"Does he care about you? Honestly, I think he still does. Just come to think of it, he didn't have to take you home the other night. Especially, kasama mo naman sina Shiloh. Tapos kasama naman niya yung si girl pero pinili niyang iwanan para lang siguraduhin na makakauwi ka ng maayos."

It was indeed Chester who took me home the other night and took care of me. As a matter of fact, I knew it was him the moment I saw a bowl of soup and med for hangover on my bedside table. Shiloh just confirmed it. 

"Ano, hopiang-hopia ka na ba sa sagot ko?" 

I bit my bottom lip and looked into his direction. He was standing in a corner, leaning against the wall, giving his undivided attention to Stella while the latter was telling him something. And as he smiled at her, a hand squeezed my heart so tight it hurt.

I swallowed and mumbled. "How? Look at him. He looks so fine without me." I turned to Sea with a pained smile. "I need to go. Could you.."

Sea nodded as she seemed to understand. "Ako ng bahalang magdahilan. Message mo ako kapag nakauwi ka na."

My friends wanted to have a little get together at our tambayan. Honestly, I was having second thoughts of coming because I was conflicted; I want to move on for real and yet, I badly long for just a glimpse of him. 

"Jowa kita?" I joked to lighten up the mood.

"Pwede rin! Masarap kaya akong maging jowa!" I chuckled. "Sige na. Uwi na bago ka pa nila mapansin. Hindi ka papaalisin ng mga iyan."

Tipid akong tumango. Before I left, I allowed myself to have one last glimpse of him. 

The next day, I woke up early and packed everything he gave me. A lump formed in my throat as I held the earring. This is probably the hardest for me to let go for letting this go means it is final. It is really over. There's no turning back. I swallowed and put it another box along with the other jewelries and stuff.

After taking a shower and getting dressed, I called my driver. There's something I must do before I finally let go.

"Manong, tama po ba itong pinuntahan natin?" I asked with my forehead creased as the car slowly came to a halt.