GAP 2: ROAD TO FOREVER

CHAPTER 59 : GAME OF PRETENSE

Sam's POV

It was a beautiful day!
I was busy thinking about what to do and where to take you.
I finally decided on touring around Harvard for you.
I had everything planned but life isn't always kind.

I was surprised to see Kirk outside my house.

I wanted to ask what he was doing here but I already knew.
I knew what he wanted and couldn't accept it.
I wanted to stay longer with you so I didn't want to see him.

I wanted to pretend to not have seen him but that's hard to do when the other person made sure to make his presence known.

If I don't meet him now, i'm sure he will come and meet me instead and I couldn't risk you meeting him.

He came here for me and he made sure I knew it, so I couldn't escape even if I wanted to.

Why are you always saying things I don't want to hear Kirk?
I know I'm a coward.
I know what I did was wrong but I wanted to put myself first this time around!
At least this once I was allowed to choose for myself right?
I was miserable! I needed Mon!
I couldn't go back now and live in that empty house where I can only think of killing myself.
I had to do what only I can do for myself

The company wasn't stable at all.
I know that!
I'm sorry if I left all the burden up to you!
I'm sorry if I ran away!

I knew that company was only stable because I was there.
I knew that the moment I left, everything would come crashing down.

yet I still made the decisions I made, because that was the only thing that I could do!
I wouldn't have been able to act like myself even if I stayed.
I would have ruined everybody close to me.

I don't wanna dare think about the chaos that I have left behind. It's too painful

Can't you have me pretend a little while longer?

I'm still hoping that Mon will love me back one day and I'm not willing to give up on it!
At least allow me to hope!
I at least deserve that much!

I'm ok with getting hurt if I can stay by her side! I can take it!
I will never leave Mon!

So just why did u have to come here and remind me of all that i was running away from?

I'm already hurting enough!
I'm afraid that my decisions were wrong!
I'm afraid that all of this would still be for nothing!
I'm afraid of her not wanting me back!
But what else can I do but hope?

I'm worried about grandma and the company too but I already made a decision and i'm sticking by it.
It has always been Mon!
I really cannot love anybody else! I tried I really tried!!!
but now, I refuse to think about anything else!
I will stay even if she doesn't love me!
I still believe she would love me back one day and you cannot take that away from me! No one can. I'd rather die!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I didn't have the time to respond to Kirk because I heard Mon and the next thing I saw was her face. She was pale and obviously in pain so i quickly run to her!

I couldn't think about anything else! My mind with filled with Mon!

I didn't care that I had to leave Kirk there alone!

When I came closer, I saw that she had a nosebleed and my mind went blank! I was so worried!
To make matters worse, without notice Mon lost consciousness!
It's a good thing I was able to catch her!

This has never happened before!!! Just what is happening Mon?

I didn't know what to do so I shouted for her parents to come! I shouted as loudly as I could but when I saw they were not coming, i couldn't wait any longer and so I immediately lifted Mon up and came to them instead in sheer panic.