Owen Changes His Mind

17. Despair 1/2

TW: suicidal thoughts
Seriously, mind the tag

Rasbi was drawn to the prison. Something about the hot oppressive atmosphere made her antsy to leave, and to leave Owen behind once and for all. But to do that, Rasbi needed closure. She needed to see the terrible fire eyed murderer in prison, helpless to follow behind her, never to stalk or hunt or kill again.

As she snuck in, Rasbi hardly gave a thought to Guts. But Guts was sleeping at the bottom of the ladder to the prison, their tall lanky form curled and draped around the ladder. Rasbi's startled cry led to Guts stirring. A moment later, Rasbi had fled back up the ladder, and Guts following.

"Rasbi?" Guts exclaimed in mild surprise. They eyed her warily. "What are you doing?"

"I thought I'd ask this time. Do you think I could visit Owen? I need to make sure he's going to stay here," Rasbi tried to explain. Guts started at her, eyes half lidded. "Okay yeah, I was on a murderous rampage," Rasbi admitted, "but I'm not anymore! And I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you, Guts. Owen murdered my family, my sister, and the hope my people had for peace. So it's understandable I'd want to kill him, but Apo was right, I deserve better than that. I deserve to move past this. That's why I've got to see him, Guts. I need to see that he's trapped here, that he won't escape."

Rasbi looked hopefully up at the exceptionally tall demon, who was folding their arms and looking skeptical. "I do think he deserves to die," they said, "but not under my watch, and not in my prison." They paused to consider Rasbi. "Tell you what. If you check in your weapons with me, I'll let you visit him. I think that's more than fair."

Rasbi nodded gratefully, letting out a breath she didn't realize she'd been holding. She quickly passed over her darts and throwing knives, feeling lighter and more dangerous without them, and waited for Guts to open the way.

Guts followed her down. "I'll be out of hearing range. Just come back when you're done," they explained.

"Sure," Rasbi muttered, distracted because there he was. The same person who had murdered her sister, years ago. Rasbi didn't know exactly how long it had been, but she knew they'd been in the maze for longer than a year at least. Rasbi walked right up to the bars, observing Owen as if he was an animal. She still jolted when his orange eyes flicked up to meet hers. Rasbi's words stuck in her throat. Her anger threatened to overwhelm her.

Then he spoke. "Rasbi," Owen rasped. "What are you doing here? Come to kill me?"

Rasbi's fists clenched of their own accord, and she remembered she had an axe that she hadn't considered a weapon before. "No," she forced out. She looked at the dried out fermenting apples rotting on the floor. "I just came to see what a rotten fruit you really are."

Owen looked down at the chalkboard, then back up to Rasbi. His expression was one of acceptance, or was that pity? "You must have been so scared of me. You were only a child at the time. I'm sorry, Rasbi," the murderer said. "I'm sorry."

Rasbi felt like she'd been slapped. She reared back in disgust. "You don't deserve to be sorry," she hissed through clenched teeth. "You don't even deserve for me to kill you. You deserve to be left behind, forgotten, like a dirty rag, dying here because nobody was willing to stay behind to take care of scum like you."

Owen lowered his head again. He didn't object. He hunched away from her, as if he was ashamed.

"Look at me, Owen," Rasbi found herself screaming. Owen crouched in a corner and turned to look at her. There was no fear in his eyes, only a terrible all consuming sadness. "You deserve to die alone. But I don't deserve to have my hands stained by your filth," she sneered.

Rasbi watched Owen pale and sneered. She watched Owen swallow and she grinned at his fear. Finally. "Yeah," she heard him agree, and Rasbi's expression twitched into surprise. "I won't argue, Rasbi. I'm a monster. I'm done hunting. I deserve to die."

Rasbi shuffled back a step, then leaned forward. "Good," she growled, "stay that way." Then Rasbi backed away, only turning her back once she was out of hearing range. "What the hell!?" Rasbi hissed to Guts when they were both climbing the ladder out. "He agreed with me!?"

"What did you even say?" Guts asked, curious. "What happened? I couldn't hear." Rasbi didn't speak again, shaking her head in confusion or anger, Guts didn't know. Guts followed her out into the clearing. "Rasbi? Are you okay? Wait, your weapons-"

Rasbi finally turned to face Guts. "Why did he say that?" She asked in a much smaller voice than Guts was expecting.

"Say what?" Guts asked Rasbi.

"He said... he agreed with me that he needed to die. That he deserves to die."