𝓗𝓾𝓼𝓫𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓲𝓷 𝓵𝓪𝔀

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝟐𝟏. 𝟏

Ford's POV:

I have really admired Mark for a long time since he entered the world of the showbiz industry, although it never occurred to me that we would have an interaction because he is famous and it is very impossible for me to have a chance to get close or see him.

I chose to hide from everyone, even my friends, that I admired Mark, because almost the entire Chulalongkorn University idolized Gemini.

I did not expect the day when I heard that Mark had a shooting at the University. I was so happy when I found out that news because I would finally see the one I idolized, but the smiles on my face disappeared when the photos of Mark and Fourth spread on social media throughout the campus.

I was so insecure about Fourth because Mark met him, I didn't know if I would be happy or hurt because I could see Mark's smiles from the every angle of the photos while staring at Fourth as if he was admiring my friend.

Every time we walk on Fourth's campus, Mark always approaches him and talks to him, it's fun to feel that the person you idolize is so close to you, but... The person being approached is your friend.

I did everything to separate the two of them in my own way, I tried to talk and advise Fourth to avoid Mark because of the avoidance issue... But I really did it because of jealousy.

Fourth always says that Mark is just his friends, Prom and I are both aware that his reassurance eased the insecurity and jealousy I feel towards Fourth because he only considers Mark a friend.

Until the day came when the jealousy and insecurity accumulated in my chest became too much when I saw that Mark and Fourth were trending on social media because of their laughter in the cafeteria, I invited Prom to go see Fourth and Mark to wean them not because of I'm concerned about Fourth's well-being, but I'm too jealous and insecure.

I used my calm reaction as a way so that Fourth would not notice me since Prom preached to him first, I was trying to show that I was concerned about Fourth... But no.

It may sound selfish, but I'm really insecure about Fourth, I want to be like him. He is very lucky in the part that she became close to Mark, which is my biggest dream. How did Fourth become Mark's friend so easily?

After Prom and Fourth had a fight, I felt very guilty for Fourth. Everyone in Chulalongkorn University kept bashing him because of him and Mark.

My anger toward Fourth subsided when I talked to him on campus about what Prom was going through, I tried to comfort Fourth so he wouldn't feel that I had favoritism among the three of us.

Until I found out again that Fourth and Mark had contact with each other, I was very furious and triggered when I felt insecure about myself again.

I don't know what was going through my mind at that time, but I planned to rush Fourth to his house and attempt to take Fourth's life.

Yes, I was the one who attempted to kill Fourth in his own house, I tried to strangle him until he suffocated from the insecurity that accumulated in my chest.

But I suddenly realized when I remembered the death of my mom, I was always blamed for her death and now... I was able to try to kill my friend.

So I decided to hit him on the head with a Trophy to make him lose consciousness, rather than continue to choke him by the neck and lose his life.

"I'm sorry, Fourth. I'm really sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you. I'm sorry." I said tearfully as I removed the cover from my face after hitting him on the head.

Before I left, I was even more surprised when I saw that Fourth with Gemini was on call, right then I knew that there was something secretly Fourth and Gemini.

I hurriedly left the house and left Fourth unconscious, because I knew that Gemini would be heading to his house.

That's when I realized how bad I was with Fourth, that he doesn't deserve a friend like me. I betrayed Fourth, what I caused him was more painful than the fans bashing him!!

I really hate myself! I was able to attempt the life of my own friend just because of my obsession with Mark!!

I was so sorry for what I did to Fourth and Mark that I rushed to the parking lot of the GMM building to pour out the anger I had accumulated on him! Maybe I expected too much that Mark would also notice me because I'm Ford's friend but I'm wrong!

I was too obsessed with idolizing and that was my biggest mistake!!