The fastest way to kill a Someone AndWhy

Chapter 34: Her Special Day

"Well that's the last time I host another birthday party." "Why?" Henry asked. "Amari was hardly there. She danced a little but she was mostly held upstairs in a guest room.." "With someone else?" Henry asked. "No.. She was by herself." Heelix smirked. "I don't think she's into anyone but you Casper!"

I thought about it.

Changing things? Making things better between me and Amari but I didn't.
..
(Last Day: Spying on Assassins)
[The helicopter ride]
It was raining so hard! We knew exactly where they were and we had a mission to take the Assassins out! There were only a few of them so we were told again and again that we did not have anything to worry about..

Today we were ending our alliance with the Assassins!

They betrayed us in some way and Michael felt he was too good to work with them. That meant we were losing them as a sponsor too. So we'll be expecting a significant loss in funds soon.. and it'll probably start with our meals!

Michael would starve us before he loses a house.

I was writing in my journal..

My teammate besides me, Williams kept looking over..

"What ya writing over uh in there?" "It's.. a journal my therapist gave me." I didn't want to speak to him. "Do those really work?" "Journals?" "No, therapist?"

I didn't know how to answer him.

"Right.. Well I wrote too.. a letter to my wife for this trip.. My kids.. Do you have any little ones now at home, Casper?" What home? "No I don't." "Well I'm happy you're not a father. It would be too much for you.. And I'm happy that we got some news that we'll be fighting up some Assassins soon.. because it's likely that all of us aren't gonna make it.. This could be a one way trip for some of us."

I looked at him.

"I never put too much pride into my luck Casper.. and I'm a very prideful man.. but I know we aren't gonna make it." "Well it's never a good idea to never have luck!" He gave me a smile when I said that. Amari, who sat across from us, laughed.

"Do you love your wife?" "Of course I do! Don't you have someone in your life you can't help but to love? Or you had that with Alice once.."  I put my head down. "It's hard to lose someone you love. I've lost so many friends, but I can't imagine losing someone I'd say I was in love with."

"I think people let go of someone they love before they can lose themselves in them.." They both looked at Amari. "It's easier to lose someone now before you lose yourself if you ever end up losing them in the end.. It's easier to push people away so you never get that chance.. That close.. You never build that.. relationship where if you lose them you feel like you just lost everything.. But I hate that. How people are too scared to lose.. It's not that they're scared to love.. It's that they're scared to lose something they have.. Cus maybe that's just what's been keeping them together for so long. If they lose what they love so much it'll haunt them.. And it'll hurt so bad.. But people expect to love and go without any loss.. Everything that's beautiful died. At least you got to see it while it was still alive.. At least you got to.. love that beautiful person.. while they were still here. I'm sick of people crying at funerals."

She looked anywhere but at me when she said that.

Williams looked at Casper and now he could finally read the room..

"Like out of fear of loving them? That you'll lose yourself in them?"

She gave me her hopeless look.

I got ready to say something else to her..