Don't Leave Me Behind || Namjin AU

Chapter Seventy- Nine. The Last Time I'll Go Away

Warnings: swearing, major character death, etc.

Namjoon regretted it all.

He regretted everything he'd said and done to Yoongi, but he couldn't take it anymore. And his best friend saying those harsh things to him made him feel worse.

As he sat with his back against the wall in the the rooftop of their house, he leaned his head back and stared up at the sky. Everything was blurry because of the tears pooling in his eyes, yet to spill. His hand clutched the locket he'd once given to Jin, wide open to show the pictures of them when they were younger in it, while his other hand held the moon pendant.

Had the happy teenage couple in those little pictures inside the locket, so deeply in love, any idea that they'd end up like this? One gone and the other left heartbroken beyond repair? No. What they could only think of was getting married and having a family of their own. They could have never even imagined that this might not even happen. Ever.

Reality is a fucking son of a bitch, Joon. Namjoon decided bitterly.

"I can't take this anymore," he whispered, closing his eyes so that he couldn't see the dark purple sky with the beautiful, clear galaxies anymore. His vision was as dark as his mind.

"Don't leave me, Jin, please," he begged quietly, feeling his cheeks getting wet again with hot tears that streamed down them. "Come back. Come back. Please... Come back to m-me. I-I... I can't... p-please."

His pleadings were greeted by silence and he let out a long drawn-out scream of heart ache that ripped his throat, and he heard it echo back to him, nobody being there to hear him out.

"Please, please," Namjoon whimpered, clutching Jin's locket and pendant desperately to his aching chest, running out of tears even though his voice remained as hurtful and broken as it was before. "C-come back to me. P-please, Jinnie, please. Come b-back."

A small gentle hand touched his shoulder, and Namjoon's eyes immediately snapped open as he looked around to find the person he'd been dying to see, to hold, to speak to. The same person he was begging with his everything to come back to him.

Jin's large and beautiful doe eyes sparkled with tears as he sat next to him on his knees, leaning towards Namjoon as he carressed the long-haired man's face, his clothes surrounding both of them, so pure and bright, as if they alone could protect them both from the pain they'd been going through so much.

Namjoon sniffled as he leaned onto Jin's touch, holding his delicate hand in his large one, feeling so strangely perfect together, but the heartbroken man's face contorted in deep sorrow and longing when he still felt the barrier blocking them from completely reuniting, being completely together.

"I'm so sorry that you're hurting so much, Joonie," Jin whispered, his honey-sweet voice cracked and tearful, crystalline tears clinging to his long wet eyelashes. "Why can't you just forget me? I can't stay. I can't stay anymore seeing you being in pain or the others hurting as well. Just let me go. It hurts me. It's hurting both of us, can't you see?"

"I can't," Namjoon said as he cried, shaking his head frantically as he still squeezed onto Jin's hand, pressing it to his cheek, still not feeling like he was really there with him. "I can't leave you. Ever. Though you leave me every time."

"Just because I'm out of sight doesn't mean I'm not there with you, Joonie," Jin whimpered, his bottom lip quivering.

"I said it before, Jinnie! I don't want you to ever be out of my sight," Namjoon answered firmly, though he sobbed as if his heart was crushing to dust over and over again. "I want to be with you. Always."