Maloi's POV
After singing 'Paragraphs', I realized how much I like Stacey. Deep and burning.
"Stacey .... I like you... No, I love you. Yes, I love you." That was my confession to her. I suddenly blurted it out because of too much emotions.
In the quiet moments of my life, when the world around me fades into a distant hum, my thoughts inevitably find their way to her. She is a radiant star in the vast expanse of my existence, illuminating every corner of my heart with an unparalleled brilliance. My feelings for her run deep, coursing through my veins like a river of pure emotion, binding me to her in a way that words struggle to convey.
"Maloi, what are you saying? You like me? You love me? What?" she asked as she sat beside me. I can sense that she's still looking at me.
"I love you, Stacey. Since day one. I don't know, it just happened. Fast, deep, and I couldn't stop myself." I turned to her and let her see through me. I let her see how pure and genuine my feelings towards her.
"Stacey, you saved me. From all the sadness the world has given me. From all the pain and possible traumas. You saved me and still saving me. Being with you, I've realized that this isn't just some kind of admiration. I- I learned to love you in the process of figuring out why I liked you." I added. Siguro nga sobrang lakas ng loob ko ngayon. Sobrang tapang ko rin compared to my friends. But I just don't want things to be complicated. If it's a heartbreaking no, I'll accept it. If she'll give me a chance, I will be grateful for it.
She laughed. An awkward laugh. "I don't know what to say." she said.
Her laughter, even if it's awkward or not, is a melody that dances through the air, a symphony of joy that never fails to lighten my spirit. Every time our eyes meet, a thousand stories are exchanged, a silent language of connection that we alone seem to share. Her presence is a balm for my soul, a refuge from the chaos of the world, a sanctuary where I can be myself without fear or pretense.
"I'm willing to wait, Stacey. If you'll let me." I told her.
"Maloi, I don't think I can process it right now. I just got rejected by Colet." she said.
"Oo nga pala, you like her. I'm still here, Stacey. Andito lang. Willing to wait." I assured her.
But as much as I adore her, I am painfully aware of the chasm that lies between us. She is a rare gem, a tapestry of grace and beauty woven with threads of elegance and charm. And in contrast, I see myself as a mere mortal, fumbling through life with imperfections aplenty. She moves in circles that I can only dream of, a world of sophistication and allure that I struggle to navigate.
"Huwag kang mapressure, okay? Kapag okay na lahat, process everything that I've told you. Whatever your answer is, I will accept it. Let's remain as friends, alright?" I held her chin and made her look at me. We're having a moment, we're just gazing each other's eyes.
She nooded, and smiled genuinely at me. There, that smile again. 6th. Her 6th genuine smile towards me, and I'll never get tired of counting.
Nang medyo malalim na ang gabi, I told her that I'm going home. Sumama siya sa akin hanggang sa gate nila. Tahimik pa rin siya at tila nag-iisip. Kapag lilingunin ko siya, ngingiti lang siya ng tipid.
"Maloi, I'm so sorry." she said, kahit wala siyang idugtong ay alam ko kung ano ang tinutukoy niya.
"You don't have too. Give yourself time to think, okay? I'll always be here." I smiled at her. I tiptoed to pinch her cheeks.
It is an ache that resides in the depths of my heart, the knowledge that her affections are directed elsewhere, toward someone who seems to effortlessly match her brilliance. Sa best friend ko.
I remembered how I watched from afar as she stole glances to Colet. Those stares and gazes are what I yearn for. It is a bitter pill to swallow, the realization that my love may forever remain unrequited, a star-crossed longing that defies the realm of possibility.
Yet, even as I grapple with the ache of unattainable love, I cannot help but cherish the moments we do share. Our conversations, however fleeting, are like drops of nectar that sustain me through the drought of longing. Her smile, bestowed upon me like a precious gift, is etched into my memory, a beacon of hope that lights up my darkest hours.
So I continue to navigate this delicate dance, caught between the intensity of my feelings and the reality of our circumstances. I love her with a depth that knows no bounds, even as she remains beyond my reach. For in the symphony of emotions that swirl within me, there is a bittersweet beauty that only unrequited love can bring - a testament to the resilience of the human heart, a reminder that love, in all its forms, is a force that shapes us and defines us, even when it remains unfulfilled.
After ten steps away from their house, I turned around and whispered, "I love you, Stacey." as if she'll hear me. As if she'll see my heart and soul waiting for her to love me back. "I will wait." I whispered again before walking towards our house.
Nang makauwi ako, my parents are not here. Ako lang pala mag-isa ngayon. Sakto namang tumatawag ang mga kaibigan ko.
"Hey!" Colet greeted, naka-off cam pa ang loko.
"Dimwit! Open your cam." Mikha said, so, Colet obliged.
"Oh, we thought you're crying already." I teased. Syempre, alam naming lumabas si JL and Jhoanna. Malamang nasaktan siya kahit pa nag 'friendly date' sila ni Stacey kanina.
"How's your date with Stacey?" Sheena curiously asked. Nakita kong natigilan si Colet.
"I rejected her." she confessed. Mikha and Sheena doesn't seemed surprised. Well, they're aware that Colet's into Jhoanna. While me, I already knew it because Stacey told me earlier.
"Dude I'm jealous! I like stacey since day one." I dramatically told her.
"I don't know. I felt guilty, but, the heart wants what it wants." Colet answered and I know she's telling the truth.
"Let's do online shot!" Sheena yelled while raising her beer.
"Shut up! You're just lucky you've already found your the one." Mikha told her. Yes, sobrang bata pa nga lang ni Sheena but she already found her Gwen. That brat is too lucky! Baka pamangkin lang kami ni Lord? Baka si Sheena lang ang anak?
When the call is over, I stared at the ceiling. Thinking about what happened earlier at Stacey's. Magaan ang loob kong nasabi ko na sa wakas pero masakit pa rin sa akin 'yong ideya na hindi naman ako ang gusto niya. The possibility of me being rejected is 99%.
Pero may 1% chance pa naman di'ba? So I'll take it. Chance is still a chance no matter how small it is.
In the calmness of the night, with a heavy heart, I sought solace in a quiet place, a sanctuary where my thoughts could find clarity amidst the turmoil of emotions. I gazed upon a butterfly, its delicate wings fluttering against the canvas of the night sky. She's like a beautiful butterfly in the night sky. And in that moment, a newfound resolve began to unfurl within me.
Dear Diary,
The truth was evident: love was not a cage, but a gift. It was meant to be shared without strings, without demands. To truly love someone was to embrace their happiness above all else, even if it meant releasing the grip of possessiveness. And so, with each passing thought, I let go of the desire to hold on tightly.
But I will wait, no matter what.
Love,
Yves
*********
Will update In The Midst of The Crowd Book 2 later tonight 🤍
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90210 (BINI Series #3)
FanfictionWe all carry hurricanes and heavy storms in our heads. Crying heals the clouded heavy heart. When Maloi choose to be the sunshine of their group, she found it so hard to share her own chaos. But then, Stacey came and for her, meeting the cat-eyed gi...
