A normal day

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I am zoning out. The teacher's teaching. I can almost hear it. A little hum of noise in the background. This feels nice. Better than stressing continuously. I can keep it inside, no one will see it on my face. A bright spark of pain makes me flinch, hissing at the suddenness of the feeling. I pull my thumb from between my teeth and look down at it. Blood wells up from between the nail and cuticle. I squeeze it tightly, soothing and intensifying the ache, my hands clenched together in my lap. I look up, catching the eyes of a few of my peers as theirs dart away. I look to my teacher. She's staring at me. I lower my head in shame.

"Ace, are you okay?"

I look up again and smile, nodding. "Tore a cuticle," I say, "It's all good."

She nods at my statement and continues the lecture. I look down back to my desk. No one is starring. They all believe me. They don't even care. So why does it feel like I'm crying?

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