so far this is my life

break up pt2. final

Fast Forwarding a little bit, my school was doing a testing day and then we had a weird thing with the devices but yah and in the middle of that all kye had started texting me and I wasn't in the mood okay? Like I did not want to deal with her shit at all. Like I did not have the energy for that shit at all. But anyway she wanted to try and talk to me and I told her I didn't want to talk. I wasn't hiding shit I just didn't want to talk. Which she started a fight about it saying I never wanted to talk and shit never happens and things won't get fixed bc I never do anything and ik she was trying to get a rise out of me but like why? What was the point- to start a fight? lol. But I kept being dry, and at one point, I gave in and gave her what she wanted, which was yk a reaction. I don't remember the whole thing, nor do I care too. There's no point in remembering it, yk? But at one point, she was telling me things were over if I didn't talk to her, and all I kept thinking was that "things are already over. I feel nothing towards you." And yeah, but we ended up sorta arguing, and I gave her what she wanted even tho I still didn't care for her. I mean, I put up with shit and now that I'm doing what she does, it's a problem? I'm good. And again like I said we got into a fight and I at one point told her I was angry and that she never apologized which pissed her off and I continued and then she sent me screenshots of like 2-3 times she's apologized to me and that was it compared to all the times I apologized to her. There were even times I apologized just to make myself feel better bc I knew she never would. Anyways after I gave her the reaction, she wanted things to go back to "normal." I pretended like things were fine and then went back to leaving her on seen or delivered for hours. And I carried on with my life of getting closer with my crush and I've known this man since freshman year and my God he's just so sweet and he's nice and he treats me well and I'm happy with him and he goes to my school and we have a lot of the same friends and my family likes him and he likes them and gosh he's just perfect. Fast forwarding a little bit tho, over time, I slowly started to block kye on things. First, it was muting her messages on certain apps. Then, it was blocking her on Facebook along with her family. And then it was blocking her number. And then blocking her on 2 of my Instagram accounts. And then I had it to where she couldn't see what I posted at all. Then, on the same night, I blocked her on my private Instagram and on snapchat all in one night, and I went to bed happy for once. It's like genuinely not just bc of Tanner but because I have no more drama in my life. I have no more issues or worries. I don't have to deal with fights or jealousy or being anxious or cheating or anything. And I had blocked her on snapchat right after she spammed me with the word "guess," and i guessed 3 different times and then gave up and she obviously didn't like that and sent me 3 dots and when I asked what she goes "nothing u obviously doing care" and I didn't respond bc your right I don't. And she sent me a snap, and I sent her one back and eventually walked into my sister's room, and Kye was blocked.  And I have never felt more proud of myself than in that moment. Like I told some of my closest long-term friends and God, it was such an amazing feeling.
I regret nothing. I mean, there is a part that will yk love the good parts about her, but when I think on things, I'm not angry,sad or happy, or anything honest. I kinda just feel nothing towards that whole situation. It was a lesson and yeah.