baklaan party ● pordee

23

at dahil may pa-ayuda today si itay, sinipag ako hihi

...

I woke up to find Michelle gone. Checking the time, I saw it was only 6:32 am.

Why on earth is she up so early?

I tried going back to sleep, but for some reason, I couldn't anymore. I miss Michelle's warmth so badly. The bed feels so cold and empty without her.

So I just decided to go down and find her, which didn't take too long for me to do because as soon as I got down, I saw Rhian and her in the living room. Michelle is sitting on the sofa, Rhian nestled comfortably on her lap. Rhian bursts into a fits of giggle as Michelle says something to her.

A bitter taste fills my mouth, and my heart drops a little but I ignore it. 

God, I wanna die.

I back away and speed walks the rest of the way back to the guest room, shutting the door with a little more force than necessary.

I collapse on the bed, screaming against the pillow in frustration.

Why the hell am I even feeling like this? This feels so childish and pathetic.

A knock on the door comes and in an instant, I knew it was Michelle.

"Go away." I say, voice muffled by the pillow.

I hear the door open, and I glare at her.

"My God. Why so grumpy?" she replies, a playful grin tugging on her lips.

"Whatever" I say, reaching for my phone to divert my attention into it instead.

She lays beside me, poking me in the cheek. "How are you up so early?"

"You weren't here when I woke up. Didn't know you and your wifey likes to spend a lot of time with each other in the mornings." I mutter, eyes still glued on my phone.

She lets out a chuckle, gently resting her head on my shoulder. "We just needed to talk about something. Don't be jelly jelly anymore. I'm all yours now."

I fight back a grin, pulling away from her a little, pretending to be unfazed. "You better be. I don't like sharing."

She smiles, snaking her arms around my waist, as we fall into a comfortable silence.

The silence made my mind wander. I knew that the usual playful banter was a facade. The crack between us will not disappear just like that. I knew that the easy intimacy was a desperate attempt to paper over the damage that I had caused.  

"Michelle" I whisper, my voice barely audible. A hum escapes her lips in response, drawing my gaze to her face. I search her eyes, desperate for an answer. 

"Are we okay?" I manage to speak, suddenly feeling a lump in my throat. 

A tense silence fills the air, heavy with unspoken words. Finally, she spoke, her voice barely a whisper, mirroring the vulnerability of mine.

"I...I don't know." and it broke my heart. 

But I understood. 

I reach for her hand, rubbing circles, an unspoken way of me thanking her for being honest and a silent promise. A promise to earn back her trust.

"I'm sorry." I whisper, feeling tears welling up in my eyes. 

In response, she tightens her grip on my hand, gently giving it a peck, a silent gesture that spoke volumes. And that was enough for me.

We fell into a yet another comfortable silence, as I feel my eyes starting to get heavy. Beside me, Michelle also seemed on the verge of sleep until her phone vibrated.