I wake up on Ares's chest, our body's still naked honestly that was one of the best moments I ever experienced but that feeling goes down and is replaced with guilt
I lay on his chest thinking about our future on how it will be but my mind then drifts off to Kylie and I start feeling guilty all over again as no woman deserves to get cheated on and what I am doing is wrong.
I then untangle Ares from me and slip out of bed putting on his shirt. As much as hate Kylie she doesn't deserve to get cheated on.
I go inside the dining room just to think for a well to clear my mind on this situation as I feel so disgusted with myself but the thing is I'm deeply in love with him I don't know what to do.
I feel tears pouring out of my eyes as hate the way I'm feeling as I'm disgusted with myself, why is life the way it is?
I then feel someone's arms wrap around me, "Morning Rhe" Ares whispers in his morning voice and I sigh giving him a slight smile.
"What's wrong Rhe?" he asks as he must have noticed me crying.
"I hate the way I'm feeling Ares what we doing is wrong I can't sit here and pretend like everything is daisies and rainbows it's destroying me," I say as tears leak out of my eyes. I feel like I'm about to have a breakdown
Ares kneels on to ground goes on his knees in front of me takes one of my hands and kisses it, "What can I do to make you feel better Rhe?" Ares asks and I sigh.
"End off things with Kylie right this instant and we both come clean to her," I say as the guilt will soon probably make me fall into depression.
Ares lets go of my hands and stands up," You know I can't do that Rhe, just wait a little while and then I can end this relationship with her" Ares says.
"Fine I will give you a week Ares as you don't realize it's killing me slowly and slowly and I can't go back into my depression phase again I won't let myself go back into that phase again," I say.
"I promise I will find a way," he says.
I get up and grab my phone phoning Jasper to come and pick me up and send him my location also to put clothes for me in.
"Where are you going Rhe?" Ares asks as he sees me picking my heels up Ares must have seen me speaking to Jasper.
"Ares I refuse to be the other woman in your life and I can't deal with the fact I'm hurting another person so I will wait for you to sort this shit out but for now I think we should just stop seeing each other for the time being," I say fixing my hair.
"But I love you," he says making me stop in my tracks.
"Sometimes love isn't enough Ares and I deserve way more than just to be your other woman at the moment," I say
"You can't tell me all those moments we experienced was you not being happy because I know for a fucking fact you were happy," he says looking at me.
"You're right I was happy I thought I was in some fairytale but I woke up and realized that in this fairytale I'm the villain the other woman," I say feeling lots of tears leak out of my eyes and running down my cheeks as
"I will fix it just give me some time damnit," he says clenching his jaw.
Ares then gets a call telling me Jasper has arrived. Ares then quickly hugs me and leans in for a kiss which I reject.
"So you don't want to kiss me now?" Ares asks making me roll my eyes.
"I'm just keeping the little self-respect I have left okay," I say and walk out just to see Jasper holding a breakfast sandwich for me and I smile.
He gives me my pants and I put them on underneath the shirt i then look at Ares one last time before I leave.
●●●●
For the last few days, I have been lying not eating have even taking a break from work as Blair thought it was a good idea.
Apparently, I have been thinking for a well about moving to New Zealand I want fresh air and also maybe moving my business there i mean I love New York but I need a change here it's tiring.
It's Layla's 26 birthday coming up now and she is throwing a huge party at one of her holiday houses it's a getaway she is inviting me alongside Jasper and I have a feeling Ares will be there.
Ares has been respecting my wishes not to stay away and I'm happy for that reason.
"So how are you and Ares going?" Jasper asks breaking my thoughts.
"Um, we're fine I guess," I say not wanting to let Jasper know. Jasper hates Ares for making me feel this way but I let Ares make me feel this way I was equally to blame.
"Ugh Rhea I'm not telling you what to do but if Ares loved you he would forget about his business shareholder and call this engagement off as you going back into depression again it was hard enough years ago when I met you and I don't want to see you go thru this again," Jasper says looking at me with worry evident on his face
"So you saying he doesn't love me?" I ask Jasper as Ares just admitted to me he loves me.
"I do think he loves you but the love he gives is just not enough you just love him a bit harder than he ever did," Jasper says
"Since when have you started being Anti Ares?" I asked a few days ago he told me Ares is a good dude.
"I think when he started to make you feel like this again other than I just think you fell first and you fell harder again," Jasper says and I sigh.
"So what do you think I should do?" I ask Jasper as I don't know.
"I don't know Rhea all I'm saying is ask yourself if all that happened was worth it," Jasper says and continues to eat his Chinese takeout
I sigh and go back to sleep. A few hours later I got the message from Layla asking if we would come and I think for a well I do need a vacation to clear my mind plus Jasper will be with me.
I tell Jasper we going to South Africa, Capetown. We then start packing our bags and we book a flight immediately.
A few hours later as we board the flight I rest my head on Jasper's shoulder and think about all the memories of Ares and me when we were younger and older and I sigh. After the 17 hours and 40-minute flight, I feel well rested.
Jasper then gets us an Uber to Camps Bay beach house and I look around Cape Town is one beautiful place.
We then finally arrive at the beach house and I smell the fresh ocean it's so amazing. Layla then opens the door and pulls me in for a hug and sigh it's nice being in your best friend's arms.
"Oh, I'm so glad you guys made it." Layla gushes, "Trust me guys we going to have such a blast," she says
I hear someone laughing just to see Ares and Kylie coming from downstairs. He says something to her that makes her laugh so loudly. Ares must have noticed me because he looks at me and I can see there is some regret in his eyes i then look away from him to Layla.
"Yep, we will have one heck of a blast," I say to Layla putting on a fake smile as I feel sad all over again.
****
Poor Rhea but she knew all along what she was getting into😢
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I will never be his truly
Romance"Ares you know one thing I realized as much as you say you love me I know for a fact, that I was never your truly or will ever be your truly," I say looking at him feeling tears well up in my eyes Rhea Naidoo has always been in love with her best...
