A Second Chance

"you. have. no. idea."

Sara

I didn't want to run with May. I wanted to go with Luke. But before they came into the coffee shop, May had told me not to go with anyone else but her. She said they all wanted to hurt me. Even Luke, Calum, Ashton and Michael.

"How do you know their names?" I had asked her.

"Um. Didn't you tell me earlier?" She had asked me.

"No."

"Oh."

I don't know why I believed her. Maybe because of being with Papa so much, I felt like she was right. I had yelled at Luke to go away, told him I didn't want to get hurt, and ran away from him. I wanted to go with him, though. I knew he wasn't like what May had told me. I didn't know him personally, but I knew he wasn't like that. Sure, he talked loud and angrily a lot, and he looked really mean. But, he wasn't like that. Was he? I kept thinking about this as May and I ran across the street.

"You did the right thing." She told me, smiling.

"Did I?"

"Yes."

"It doesn't seem like it. I wanted to go with him you know."

"And get hurt?" She stopped running.

"But-"

"But what? He's not like that? How do you know? Huh? You don't know him personally!"

"But, he said he wanted to help me!" I yelled.

"What if he was lying?"

"What if you're lying? I barely know both of you! How can I trust either of you?"

"You can trust me, because I know how you feel."

"What? WHAT? You know how I feel, huh? Sure. You know exactly how it feels to be punched, kicked, yelled at, by the person you thought wouldn't do that? You've cried yourself to sleep, thinking about why you deserved this? You've watched your father beat your brother to pieces? You've been beaten to pieces? You've witnessed your brother's death? YOU'VE FELT WORTHLESS, DEPRESSED? YOU'VE FELT LIKE YOU WANTED TO DIE? YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW I FEEL, AND WHAT I JUST TOLD YOU WASN'T ALL OF IT! NOT EVEN HALF. YOU THINK YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL? YEAH RIGHT!" I yelled at her, on the verge of tears.

I walked up to her, staring her dead in the face.

"You. Have. No. Idea." I said, walking away from her.

She didn't come after me. She just stood there. I didn't look back at her. I just walked back to the coffee shop. She had no idea.

And what I had said really wasn't even half of it.