A year on Venus

13: private card & goodbyes🖤

She only smiled and didn't say anything. "Alright I'll take care of myself for you guys. You haven't asked me to read." I said in a guttural voice.

She cracked up at that. "How can I ask you to read? Unless I want you to stop doing anything but reading and end up falling sick. You are always reading."

How she said that, sounded so silvery to my earlobes. It made me smile.

"Anyways I'll be reading hard Inshaa Allah."

"Take it slow. Don't be so difficult on yourself. But I don't want you to get in any Islamic organization here. If you must, just check online for the trusted sheikhs you've already known from home. Some people ain't Muslim but are just claiming to be one. So be careful really. And these kind of things might be rampant around here since it's a large nation. At home you atleast have a sense of so many different aspects of Islam people claiming to be real and you're knowledgeable enough to know the one you wants to follow. But people changing other's faith without them realising is so common in universities. You need to be careful. Allah knows your Intentions. So trying to memorise the Qur'an, checking trusted sheikhs pages are enough for you. Don't say you want to enter islamiyyah or join any Islamic organization you might see here. You don't know them and be really really careful. Wether they call themselves Muslims or not, what you should be careful about is deviation. I won't want anyone to deviate from following the path of Rasul saw. Follow what the Qur'an said, follow Rasul saw and don't do anything else. Wether you heard this sheikh said something, or came across some preachings, as far your heart is in doubt of that, then leave what makes you doubt. Islam is so easy. It's a simple religion. A very nice religion that always teach us about kindness. Don't make it hard on yourself. This religion Allah made so easy for us. Whatever we ain't capable of doing he didn't make it hard for us. He made everything easy for us. And I won't be happy if you wake up one day and started categorizing yourself with a specific Islamic group, being part of them or anything. Our prophet (saw) told us how Islam would ends up dividing in to morethan 70 different groups, with everyone claiming to be Muslim. But at the end of the day only one group are right and real Muslims. The other's are just fake. I'm emphasising on this Jasmine because back then in Nigeria you were there with me, but now you can imagine the fear of a mom about to be separated several miles away from her daughter. I know Allah is the one who guides. I believe He will guide you for me and keep you on the right Islamic path. But you should equally know that our Lord that guides who ever He wills, is the one who said He likes those that strives in the way of Islam. Again He made the religion super easy for us. Ask for His guidance, practice what you're capable of and leave the rest to Him. May Allah guide you and keep you safe for me." Mami finished brittly. She sounded as if she'll cry.

I raised my head up, trying to stop them, but I failed woefully at that. The tears did cascade down at last. I just hugged her and cried away my heart. I'll miss Mami. I'll miss her so bad. I'll miss everything about her, her scents, her smiles, her everything. I'll miss Bappa badly too. I've never went away from home in my life. But here I am, about to be left in a foreign land all alone by myself. But I know I have Allah. So i'm not alone. My Lord is with me. My Allah is with me.

I found myself hugging Mami so hard in Edinburgh international airport. My parents are about to fly back to Nigeria. They are about to leave.

After much hesitation I finally let go and moved on to hug my father. I hugged him like my life depended on it. I hugged him with all the strength I could gather. He finally broke the hug, i'm sure it took much strength in him to do so. He wiped away my tears before saying, "This is my private card. It's really expensive living here. You can always use it when the need arise. The pin is 1978. The year I first noticed your mom." He finished handing me the card. I don't even get why he would give me that. He had fueled up my own card for me, then why giving me another? But I didn't pay attention to that. I was more in love with crying my heart out. In fact i had even started to hiccup from all the cries. But I didn't miss how he smiled at his last sentence and Mami's eyes twinkled at that too.

"Yes dear you can have it. And please don't joke with going to hospital and taking medications. Since you know your condition. They might have said it's not that worst, since it doesn't involve operation but still don't feel any pain without going to the hospital." Mami added giving my hands a gentle squeeze in process.

"I will inshaa Allah. Thank you my Mami. Thank you my Bappa. I love you so much. Safe journey. I'll call you all, the moment you land by God grace. Greet Fahad for me"
I stated my voice sounding gruffly from crying.

It's now 9 at night. I was just looking at the card my father gave me. What could he be thinking when he gave me that? But i'm not to dwell on that. They say elders knew what a child doesn't, even if the latter is to climb a mountain.

Published 19th January 2024🖤