and we played

Chapter 60

ASHTON

"Are you sure?", Mya asks me, looking outside the window while I drive us down the street that leads to my Father's house. I came back from Boston two weeks again, two weeks in which all we did was prepare for this moment.

"I'm sure", I tell her, lifting her hand and giving it a kiss. Her eyes wonder to me, and although she seemed to be more relaxed in her voice, that blue is still hiding worries.

"We're in this together", she whispers as I drive us through the big gates leading to my hellhole.

I offer her one look again.

I need this. I won't ever admit it to her, but I'm frightened. But I need this.

I need closure.

~

The dark atmosphere meets me even as I step through the doors. Everything is so quiet. It feels like a funeral.

I place my hand on Mya's waist, keeping her close. Maddie decided she never wanted to come inside this house again, which I completely understand. Lukas didn't want to come either. Mya, to whom I told a million times that my Father is too crazy and that she shouldn't come with me, volunteered to come with me today. She somehow knew how important this day is to me.

And I love the shit out of her for that.

Some glass breaking on the floor and I pull her closer to me.

"Is that you, son?", a voice asks.

Father.

I share a look with Mya. Any sign from her that she isn't comfortable doing this, and we'll be on the way back to her house the next second. She's been letting Maddie, Lukas and I stay at her place until now. We're graduating in a few months, so her parents offered to let us live with them until then. An offer that was too kind, but we accepted. Not because Maddie and I couldn't afford a hotel room. But because we've been secretly craving to feel part of a family our entire life. And what the Cunnans have given us so far... It's pure warmth.

And I secretly want to spend as much time with Mya, so that is also a bonus.

I walk first, just in case Father decides to throw something, so that I can take it first and not her.

We arrive in the living room. Everything is empty. Lonely, sitting on an armchair, rings under his eyes, which are already red from a probably destroyed sleeping schedule, hair messy, beard growing, drink in his hands... Father. The whiskey bottle seems to be almost empty.

I look at this man in front of me, and suddenly I feel pity. But not because I'd love him and I would feel concerned about his state. The man crashed a car in me to ruin my life. But because I look at him and think of the what ifs. What if he would have looked at his children and thought about love? What if he would have stayed there and be a good parent for them? What if he wouldn't have cheated and lied to make money in his company? What if he would have fucking loved the wonderful daughter he has, even for one second? What if he would have realized what matters most?

How would his life look like now? How would my life look like now?

"I'd assume you came here to apologize", he mutters, taking a mouthful from his whiskey.

My eyes darken and all pity is gone.

"For what?", I ask, my voice so cold, it doesn't even feel like mine. I usually use a cold tone, but this one is on a whole new level. Even Mya has to turn surprised. Yet she decides to roll with it.

"Well, I guessed you were behind everything."

"It's not our fault you're not keeping your businesses clean."