Healed By Her ❤️

Chapter 33

For the first time I felt like I was going to throw up, I was overwhelmed and her crying wasn't helping at all, in fact it was making things worse

I forward my arms to hold her but she pulls back shaking head

"Nandini"

"Manik" she whimpers looking in my eyes

I couldn't take it anymore, I inched closer grabbing her into my arms, she whines a little fighting to get out of my hold.

"Baby please just hear me out, please" I whisper kissing the top of her head

"I am so tired manik" she cries

"I know darling, shh just please hear me out and I promise we won't ever have to be in this position again, just this one time. Just hear me out"

I don't even know how to describe how I was feeling right, I suck at feelings and expressing them but this is far worse, knowing that I have hurt her

"Nandini"

She doesn't say anything just sobs in my chest, her little hands fist my shirt, I wrap my arms around her pulling her even closer to me

"I am a very dark messed up person, I am not your normal person who can talk feelings or can be all smiley. I am not someone people want to be around and vice versa, I don't like being around people either. But you, nandini, you are different, I can be around you without wanting to pull my hair out. I feel stuff, I feel actual emotions around you and I can't help but stop myself from feeling things" I voice out for the first time

She sniffles but doesn't say anything

"When I told you that you can't have, it is because I am afraid to ruin you nandini, I cannot hurt you. If you get me, I won't want to let go, I won't ever step away and that will cause a lot of problems for you. You cannot have me because I will destroy you nandini and thats the last thing I want" I whisper

I run my fingers through her hair gently pulling her as close as I physically could because a part of me knew I'd lose her in the next instant

"I am sorry for creating all this trouble for you, I am sorry for everything. I should have talked to you and instead of pushing you away I should have told you that I was just teasing you"

her cheek rubs against my chest when she nods making me smile slightly

"You didn't even let me dance with you tonight, I wanted to take tons of pictures but I couldn't" she whispers making me laugh

I genuinely tried not to laugh but I couldn't, it was actually so cute, the fact that she did not say anything about feelings because her focus was on dancing and pictures

"See, even now you are laughing at me"

"Im not hun, you are just cute"

"I am sorry if I over reacted but you can't comment on my dresses"

"It wasn't that baby, it was because I couldn't keep my focus. My eyes were on you the entire night and that bastard, he was checking you out amongst others who checked you out too. Now, I don't give a shit how what this is between you and I, but no one can look at you like that, no one but me. Not a single person in this world has the right to eye what's mine"

She pulls back from my chest, her eyes gleam with happiness as she looks at me but the tears covering her face breaks my heart

"You won't ever hurt me like that?' She asks

"No, I promise baby" I whisper

"Can you dance with me then? I wanna send Ryan pictures" she pouts

"Sure I can dance with you hun"

She nods giggling making me smile finally

"I am an asshole but don't ever cry because of me" I whisper out

She just smiles looking at me, her smile only makes me smile wider than I probably ever have. I run my thumb over her cheeks wiping her  tears away, she deserves nothing but the best and unfortunately I am everything but good.

"I am sorry" I apologize once again because no matter how many times I apologize it will never be enough

"Dance" she whispers

I nod kissing her cheeks

I got up giving her my hand, she gets up holding my hand. My left hand wraps around her tiny waist, I hold her left hand in my right hand

"Do you even know how to dance?" I ask

"Does it matter?" She asks

i hum swaying a little with her, she giggles as I match her steps

"Ohh" she gasps a little when I twirl her around

"You look stunning, baby" I whisper

Her eyes shine making me happy.

"I do?' She asks

"You will never know how perfect you are"

My hands rests on her lower back as I pull her closer, a soft gasp leaves her lips. She rests her head on my chest so I rest my chin on top of her head

"Manik you are my calm" she whispers

I didn't know what to say because no one has ever said that to me.

"I know you said you are a difficult man but you are not. Sure you have your issues but everyone has issues. I have mine and you have yours but that does not make you a bad person, it makes you sophisticated but in all the good ways" 

"You are into some weird shit" I whisper

"No but I read a lot of weird shit. Stop distracting me, the point is, I appreciate the apology, thank you manik" she whispers looking up at me

"You are so gorgeous" I whisper nudging my nose against her forehead

"Hehe manik" she giggles

I swear there is not a single sound out there that is prettier than her giggles.

"Do you forgive me love?" I ask

Her eyes have never shined like they just did,

"I forgive you" she mumbles hugging me

"Thank you" I whisper

"Thank you for talking to me, I mhm I didn't have the best days but I feel so much better now"

"You hungry, little munchkin?" I ask as we continue to sway

"Mhm a little, you know what sounds bomb right now?"

"What?"

"Fries, spicy and salty fries" she says licking her lips

"Then we can get those, why don't you freshen up and I can get you some food?"

She nods smiling.