𝐀 𝐒𝐌𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐅𝐀𝐕𝐎𝐑 - 𝐦. 𝐚𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐮

𝐝𝐞𝐣𝐚 𝐯𝐮 | 𝟑𝟎

<3

you were surprised when you found osamu on the steps outside, hunched over his phone, "samu!"

he glanced back, a small smile spreading across his face as he stood up.

"you waited for me?"

osamu scoffed gently, holding his arms up, "i'm here, aren't i?"

you rolled your eyes before nudging him playfully, "thank you."

he gave a nod in response before turning to his captain, giving him a small wave. kita waved back, then turned to you, "i'll be there again tomorrow if you need any help."

with that, he bid his farewells and made his way out the gates, granting you one last glance at the exit. osamu raised a questioning brow at the gesture. he decided against saying anything though, he'd learned from last time it's better to not know certain things.

"let's go. it'll get dark soon," your friend insisted, already leading the way.

you trailed behind him quietly, your mind wandering. osamu was here, so where was atsumu? a pang of dread slowly settled in your chest. were you and atsumu going to do this again?–the little routine where he takes rain checks on you and disappears to practice?

"he's not here because he practiced extra, by the way." osamu's words broke your thoughts, "he wanted to wait for you, but he was drained, so he went home."

you met his gaze briefly before looking away in an attempt to hide your obvious disappointment, "i didn't ask."

your friend shot you a knowing look, "you wanted to, didn't you?"

for a second you stayed silent, but there was a small smile pulling at your lips.

"i know i've been really weird with that lately. i just want to remind you i'm not mad, okay? you're my best friend and he's my brother. it's gonna take me a little to.. you know.."

"i know," you told him quickly, inwardly appreciating the reminder that he had no hard feelings.

you thanked osamu for walking you home. he gave you a quick hug and a goodbye before disappearing down the street. you walked in, carefully closing the door behind you. you were swarmed with thoughts of atsumu again.

was that really the reason he didn't come today? you plopped your bag down in your room, sitting on your bed now. should you call him? no, that was a bad idea, but should you?

you bit your lip as you stared at your screen, feeling the weight of atsumu's sudden hold over you. with a shaky hand, you pressed his contact and held the phone up to your ear, your face flushing with heat.

for a moment, you thought he might not answer. and for a moment atsumu contemplated it. he thought about letting it go to voicemail.

unbeknownst to you, atsumu was on the other side of that screen simply staring at the flashing name on his phone, unsure of what to say. with a sigh, he clicked accept, ignoring the fact that talking to you right now was more complicated than he'd like to admit.

"hey, y/n," he greeted.

"hi," you replied softly, your nerves obvious. it was a subtle hint, but one that atsumu notice. he couldn't help the way his lips turned up.

"what's up?" he asked, trying to keep the conversation light.

you hesitated. what reason did you have for calling him? "nothing," you said finally, your voice trailing off. "i just didn't see you today."

"aww, did you miss me?" his teasing tone made your chest tighten, despite your attempts to shake the feeling off.

yes.

"no," you laughed, trying to brush it off. "don't flatter yourself."

"yeah, okay," atsumu scoffed, though you could tell he was grinning on the other end of the line.

"why didn't you come?" the question suddenly slipped out before you could stop yourself; it had been nagging at you since kita told you he wouldn't be coming.

"to what? the little study group or whatever he called it?" you gave a short little hum and he sighed, "i was busy."

"what were you busy with?" you pressed, again, unable to stop yourself, but you were tired of tiptoeing around certain subjects with him. you had an idea of what he was so busy with, but you wanted to hear it from him.

atsumu laughed, a sound that made your stomach turn. "am i being interrogated? i'm convinced you did miss me."

you sighed, the feeling of exasperation seeping through your voice, "what if i did?"

"then i would tease you about it," atsumu replied, his words a little softer now.

you fell silent for a second, "okay, well, i did miss you," you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper.

you expected him to tease you like he said he would, or for him to ignore it completely, but he didn't do either.

"i missed you too," atsumu confessed with a smile, "and to answer your question, i was practicing."

you hummed in acknowledgment, feeling a knot forming in your stomach at the sudden sensation of deja vu. this felt all too familiar.

you cleared your throat, attempting to change the topic, "i heard you guys have a game next week."

the conversation then fell still, making you think that maybe you had said something wrong, "yeah, we do," he replied, his voice sounding distant.

"actually, i was thinking..." he started again, "you know how i get during games and after games.. so maybe with kita helping you, it would give me more time to practice."

your heart sank at his words. was he using this as an excuse?

"are you trying to avoid me again? be honest."

your abrupt question made him flinch. you hoped that you were just jumping to conclusions, but with the way atsumu fell silent you weren't so sure anymore.

you didn't want to play this game again.

"i'm not trying to avoid you, y/n," atsumu spoke softly, "things have just been complicated."

with the upcoming game and the weird underlying emotions in your guy's relationship that he couldn't even make sense of, it was complicated.

"you mentioned," you sighed.

he felt a little bad, like if you had just made a subtle dig at the fact that he didn't tell you what he meant.

"sorry, i know it's not easy," you said quickly.

"look, when i figure out what.. complicated means, i'll tell you," atsumu tried to reassure you. it helped a little, but it didn't put you completely at ease yet.

"atsumu?"

"yeah?"

"are we good?"

the tension over the phone call slowly slipped away, "is this still about kita? i told you-"

"no.. just in general."

atsumu let out a small laugh, "yeah. we're good y/n."

you swallowed harshly, "okay. goodnight, atsumu."

"night, y/n."

you hung up, your hands a little shaky. you didn't like how familiar this all felt.

<3