Chapter 39

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What are you doing, what are you doing, what are you DOING?!

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What are you doing, what are you doing, what are you DOING?!

The truth is I have no clue.

All I know is that I want Lincoln. Scratch that, I need to feel him. I need to feel him like I've always wanted to and need to touch him like I always wanted to.

Though I was always in constant denial around him, deep down I knew. I just knew there was something there.

And now?

Lincoln's lips trace down the side of my neck and I moan as he digs into my center.

"You are so beautiful," he murmurs into the crook of my neck, the low, raspy sound of his voice settling in my core.

I only manage a whimper as he slowly captures my lips with his, asking for access into my mouth. I open willingly as he explores me ever so gently. As if I'm a drink of fine wine he's been patiently waiting for to age.

He begins grinding his very hard erection into me and I gasp. Shivers break out across my body at the unknown but pleasant sensation.

I feel him smirk against my mouth as he drops a kiss on my jaw.

"Lincoln," I breathe running my hands through his short dark hair.

He pulls back slightly his lips tilted up, "Don't get me wrong, I love you being under me and I love you making the first move but is this something you want?"

"I–" My inexperience flashes in front of my eyes and before I can overthink I say, "Yes. Yes this is something I want."

Even to my own ears, I don't sound as convincing.

Lincoln sits back eyeing me carefully. "You don't sound sure about that."

And now, the mood is broken.

I sit up, crossing my arms over my chest that I now feel very aware of.

I don't like sleeping with a bra as they feel suffocating to my body at night. I like the room but now I regret not having one on.

Yet again, I didn't expect my night to turn out like this.

"Lincoln, I think there's something I should tell you. As my boyfriend, it's–it's right for you to know."

Especially since I can see you being more than that.

Woah, when'd that happen?

Can I really see myself building a future with Lincoln?

"What is it?" He asks, reaching for my hand that began drawing circles on the sheets while my other arm is busy covering my semi-exposed breasts. "You're scaring me."

It takes me a moment to gather my thoughts.

Do I just come out and say it like I usually do?

But this is a sensitive, private matter to me. I'm going to expose myself for the first time to a man. And I don't mean that in the physical sense but much deeper that that. I'm opening my heart. My very essence.

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