Before He Met Her

Chapter Twenty Eight -

"So son, I'm glad that I was able to see you today." My father told me as he sat down across from me in the visitor lounge. "Me too, I really miss you guys." I said almost feeling like I could cry. "It's okay all that mar is that you're recovering." My father told me. "Your therapist told me that there's something that I should know?" My father asked me.

"Oh, he did?" I asked nervously as I started to bite my nails. "Whatever it is son, it's okay to tell me, I promise you I'm not going to judge you." My father said to me in a soft spoken tone of voice. Just then my mother walked in to the room and I could feel my heart race. "Mom, I'm glad you're here there's something that I need to tell you and Dad." I explained to them nervously.

"Can we please go somewhere more private, it's personal?" I asked them both. "Yes, let's go to your room." My father suggested to me. "Sounds like a plan." My mother said to me. I could feel myself starting to slip into a panic attack from what I was about to do as I opened the door.

Luckily my roommate was off to therapy for the hour so I had the place to myself until he got back. "The other night I had a little bit of an episode with my Bulimia." I said to them. "Episode what do you mean episode?" They asked me. "Guy's it's okay, just say Bulimia." I said to them. "I know I have it I'm not trying to hide it anymore." I explained.

"Okay, well what exactly happened?" My mother asked me. "You see I was having these thoughts and urges that were telling me to binge so what I did was go down to the kitchen and I began to eat basically anything that my mind was telling me to eat." "So it lasted for about a half an hour or so I think." "Son, I'm so sorry that you're having to go through this." My father said to me.

"Stop that, I don't want you feeling sorry for me." I told my father as I held back my tears. "But your my son, I feel like I've failed as a father because I couldn't see the signs in you sooner." My father explained as he walked out of my room crying. "Did I do something wrong?" I asked my Mom. "No, it's not you son, it's just hard for us seeing you like this." My mother told me.

"Okay, I can understand that but I mean he literally walked out." I said to my mom. Just then my father walked back in and somehow seemed calmer now and ready to listen to me. "I'm sorry for walking out like that, it was a lot to take in." My father apologized to me.

"No worries." I said to him. "Now, this next part I'm about to tell you is hard for me to talk about so, please just listen to me and don't get mad at me." I told my parents. "Once I realized what I had done to myself I started to realize that I had just ingested about a whole entire days worth of calories I knew it was wrong but I felt like I couldn't stop it." "So I guess my therapist was walking around and he asked me if I needed something, I lied and told him that I just had to get water."

  "But that was a lie, a big fat lie... so I of course went back to my room and I didn't realize that my therapist was following me from a distance." "My roommate asked me if I was okay, he thought I looked sick and pale." "I blew his comment off, and I rushed to the bathroom and I purged myself from what I had consumed and I thought that I'd feel so much better once I got rid of everything."

  "My therapist ended up coming in my room here to talk to me and he told me that he saw everything that I did in the kitchen." "I was so embarrassed because I really thought that I was alone and I didn't think that I'd get caught but I was stupid to do it in the first place I guess." "I apologized to him for what I did, but he told me that I didn't have to and that it was all a part of recovery."

  "But honestly Mom and Dad that's the part that scares me the most, I feel like I'm going to be stuck like this forever." I told them as the tears started to stream down my face. My parents then began to wrap me in their arms and told me that everything was going to be okay. I wished that I could believe them but I couldn't do it.