Divine's Time

13. a special girl

The breeze from the nighttime wind was steady. Walking up the long street, I was in desperate need to find out something. Anything, that would settle my rapid mind. With a heavy chest, and balled fist I stomped up the road holding a Beretta M9. My face was hot warm with hot tears as they streamed continuously. 

"D." I heard a familiar voice call out to me, in a calm but firm tone.

I turned around, to see P standing in the middle of the dark street, with only the street lights coating his brown skin.

 My mouth dropped in surprise. 

My body began to rest, as relief calmed my nervous system, I smiled from ear to ear. Ecstatic to see my big brother again.

"P!" I exclaimed. 

He looked at peace, but he had a concerned look on his face.

Walking towards me, he set both of his hands on my shoulders. I grabbed him quickly, and brought him into a hug. Holding on, for what seemed like hours refusing to let go. 

I couldn't lose him again.

"I missed you so much," I admitted in tears. 

"Look past the pain, and you will see that I'm still here baby, bro. I ain't go nowhere." P responded lowly.

I lifted my hand to look him in the eyes, but he was no longer there. I scream.

"P!" Sitting up in my bed, I breathed heavily as I came back into reality. Opening my eyes to my dark bedroom, I realized that I was dreaming of P again.

A wave of disappointment came over me, that seeing him was just in my dreams and that he was still gone. I started to cry, I grabbed my pillow and covered my face with it as I sobbed.

Some nights, I am afraid to sleep because I dream of my brother, they seem so real. In my dreams, I get to be with him again, laugh with him, play video games with, and even fight with him.  But waking up was the hardest because it all came back to me that he was gone and would never come back. 

P was my big brother, I looked to him for everything and trusted him with my life, ever since we were kids. The only person in this world I  really knew and understood me and had my best interest at heart. We did everything together, and now I'm struggling with how to manage on my own without his guidance.  

Fuck, I need to smoke. 

I looked at my phone and read the time, 3:30 am. 

I went to my living room and pulled out my rolling tray and rolled up a blunt. As I smoked, I pulled out my phone to scroll on social media. I came across a tweet from Camry on Twitter, of course, she was up at 3:00 tweeting stupid shit.

She reposted the video of the fight recorded the night she fought Erica. I haven't talked to either of them, since. Erica has been texting me, she was upset that I left her instead of breaking up the fight.

I didn't want to entertain that petty ass shit, plus, I didn't want to risk being in that house when the police came, so I dipped.

I clicked on the video and watched Camry, hold Erica by her hair and hit her all on her head. She was really fucking her up, now I see why Erica was mad at me for leaving.

"Damn," I mumbled before pulling on the blunt.

She got a couple more hits in, as Erica tried to swing back as best she could while on the floor kicking, the crowd of people was going crazy.