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the best precinct



inez: bye guys so i'm at holts and cheddar was trying to come outside w me so i let him out w me and then he pushed me into the pool..

gina: i don't think a dog can do that

inez: yeah he can't i just wanted to swim

jake: wait can i come over to swim

inez: yup

inez: bring some alcohol

jake: i am not bringing alcohol you got drunk three days ago

inez: please

jake: no

inez: pretty please w a cherry on top

jake: i'm omw but with no booze

inez: ima doordash it

gina: you can doordash alcohol?

inez: yeah i did it the other day

gina: omg this makes life sm easier

inez: ikr

three hours later

rosa: YOU CAN DOORDASH BOOZE?????????

gina: you are a little late sweetie

rosa: sorry

rosa; i was busy

gina; doing what

rosa: stuff that i do

gina: right

gina: well inez is hanging out with jake sooo do u wanna hang out

rosa; yeah i'm down

rosa: are we doing the same thing we always do?

gina: yeah minus the dinner i alr ate

rosa: same

inez: i got a hat that says i heart hot dads

inez: wait guys if you get drunk please bring me some alcohol

jake: your doing to become an alcoholic

inez: one time i went on a 7 day bender and i am not no alcoholic

jake: okay now that's crazy

gina; dang girl 7 days?

gina; were you okay after that

inez; oh i don't remember past day 4

inez: i'm pretty sure i almost got arrested on day 5

inez: i broke into someone else apartment on day 6

inez: and i threw up repeatedly day 7

inez: this was from all the videos my friends took

inez: also don't take videos if your commuting crimes

jake: holy shit

jake: idk if i'm turned on or worried for your liver

gina: or both

rosa; it's most definitely both

6 hours later

inez: JAKE LET ME FALL ASLEEP OUTSIDE AND NOW MY BOOBS R BURNT

jake: you looked comfy

inez: EVERYTHING HIRTS

jake: i told you to let me massage them

inez: NOT NOW JAKE

inez: wait can you get me my lotion out of the guest room

jake; yes am i gonna massage them

inez: no i am

jake: damn can i watch

inez: jake no

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