Don't Listen In Secret || Joshua Hong

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sleeping has been my field of mastery for all 19 years of my life. until tonight.

no matter how much i look at my chemistry teacher's face, i just can't fall asleep. did he lose his superpowers?

somehow i managed to fall asleep before the darkness of the night could settle under my eyes and i end up in a zoo in China. after i woke up i had to check my logs to make myself believe that my drunk ass actually called jeonghan. it feels like a dream.

i kept reminding myself that this isn't a date as i showered with my vanilla body wash. and that i am not trying to impress joshua as i successfully stole and applied my mom's expensive perfume and did my hair. i debated on wearing a skirt or jeans, would it look like i am trying to seduce him if i wear a skirt?

hell no. he doesn't even care what i wear. i am losing my sanity. does any of this make sense? i am meeting hong joshua!

i ended up wearing a beige skirt with a white tee. it looks casual enough .... probably.

mom : oh joshua!

shit. he is here.

i took a deep breath one last time before running down the stairs. my heart is racing. i hope i don't mess this up.

i saw joshua's face light up as i appeared from the stairs and my heart skipped a beat. the way he is looking at me with those soft eyes, one could almost mistake it for love. but that's the thing about joshua. he looks at everyone like that.

he was wearing an oversized checkered shirt but he looks so gorgeous i can't really tell if he gave attention to his looks or not. i did notice that his hair were done. maybe he has somewhere to go after this.

jihye : hello

i smiled cheerfully. i am nervous. but i am also excited. maybe i should just try to have a nice time for once. without thinking about the fact that he is only here because i helped him plan a date for yeri.

wait.

i just thought about that.

joshua : you look so cute today

i would have blushed but i recognize this tone. he is talking so softly as if i am a baby.

jihye : you look cute too.

i passed by him as i said that and joshua's flustered face gave me a strange sense of satisfaction. he probably expected me to say he looks 'cool'. well he does. he is joshua after all. but i won't say that.

i turned back to see he was still frozen on the spot.

jihye : aren't we running late?

joshua : oh.... yeah. let's go.

it's so tough to act like an adult and not hop in excitement. i tried hard not to gasp when i saw joshua's car. he must be rich rich. does that mean jeonghan earns so much now? i need to increase my sister tax.

joshua reached early and opened the door for me. he is such a gentleman. how can i not fall for him? i wish this was a date.

no. not again. 

stay in line jihye. 

remember 'you don't need to have him to love him'. 

that's bullshit.
i want to have him.

god no.

joshua : so how are you these days?

jihye : i am good.

that was a boring reply. hitting my head on a wall would be more interesting.

very good jihye. you made the atmosphere so awkward.