MCYT RANDOMNESS 2

Total Disassociation Pt 2

From then, my life as a prisoner in my own skull is torture. The Jingler controls everything: he sets cruel traps and pranks, he gives horrible suggestions at meetings, he lets Captain Jack attack me, he destroys stuff. Until I learn to disassociate from myself.

 I slip into thinking nothing as my hands, my voice and my body, do and say whatever the Vex want, focusing only on counting down how many hermits are left, how long it'll be. My hopes grow as Keralis, Joe, Mumbo die and then...

DocM77 joined the game

DocM77 blew up

He's dead.

It's over.

Demise is over.

The Jingler just stares at the message as relief, utter relief, floods through my mind. The Jingler will leave. I'll be ok. I can recover. Or find something to wipe the last however long from my memory completely and pretend I was possessed throughout Demise instead.

'You think this is over, Cubfan135?' The Jingler hisses. My blood goes cold. My hope vanishes. 'It's over when I say it's over. Regardless of your fun little death game.'

And, flicking the final lever in the room of hermits, he leaves.

Over the next few days, hope of The Jingler leaving after Demise becomes prayers to Notch that he'll go at all. His attention turns from hurting the server, to hurting me. He stops sleeping. He fights mobs and lets me deal with the damage. He pretends to Scar that everything's ok every time he messages, making up lies I'm begging my friend can see through.

After a week. Xisuma calls an urgent meeting for everyone in Demise. And I let myself feel the smallest amount of hope again that the Jingler will have to leave. And if he doesn't, the other Hermits will realize and help. But that hope fades more and more with every base the Jingler passes on the way to the shopping district, where we're meeting. He's not leaving. Why isn't he leaving? We pass Scar's terraforming shop. He's starting to dive down. He's going to hurt the hermits. He's going to do something. He's planning-

I fall.

My wings disappear in midair and I'm left plummeting, hitting the ground. It's not enough to kill me.

But the Jingler doesn't move.

I'm lying there for a moment, like a puppet with cut strings, before slowly shifting my hand.

It moves.

I'm free.

The Jingler's gone.

Which means I control everything now.

I barely remember how to breathe, gasping air as I move more and more, sitting up, almost sobbing with relief. But every movement is pain. And I feel like, any second now, the Jingler's going to take control again and I'll be stuck again.

'Oh my gosh, Cub, what happened?!'

Scar. He's here. I look up at him and he's back to normal. I manage a smile. The painful grin I've been stuck with for a month flashes through my mind.

And then a whisper. A warning.

Say. Nothing.

The Vex.

'Cub? Are you ok?' Scar frowns.

I nod.

'Y-yeah. Wing troubles.' I lie, managing to talk. The words almost sound weird coming from my mind. But I hide it. Scar holds out a hand, helping me up.

'Woah... steady there...' Scar's left supporting me as my vision blacks from the change of height and I, not used to controlling my actions, nearly fall. 'Are you sure you're ok?'

'I think I need to sit down. With the others. Where are they?'

'This way.' Scar leads me further into the center of the shopping district. A few other hermits are sitting - Tango, Ren, Stress, so I don't feel awkward leaning on the edge of a building. Xisuma's pacing. Grian's perched on a fence. I stare at the ground, still recovering, as the last hermits arrive and Xisuma starts.

'Alright... I'm going to start this meeting a little differently by asking all of you to come up with a number between 1 and 10 to describe how bad your experience in Demise was. 1 being unaffected, 10 being possession. And if you're not happy to say anything else, that's perfectly fine... we'll go through in reverse death order. Doc?'

'2 or 3... but only because there's no one left to kill.'

'Thank you. Mumbo?'

As the hermits give their steadily increasing numbers, the Vex rise in my mind, whispering again.

Say 1. Say nothing. Everything was fine. Nothing happened, Vexling. I can barely hear what Xisuma's saying. Remembering who died after me means thinking about what happened to me. Nothing happened. Nothing. Don't snitch, Cub. You're obedient now. Say 1. Say nothing happened. This is my only chance to get help from the Hermits. I'm still clenching and unclenching my hand in my pocket to remind myself that I can. I hear my heart thudding in my ears. Each breath sticks in my throat.

'...Cub?'

Every hermit turns to me. I stare at the ground.

'1.'

'Really?' Xisuma and Scar speak simultaneously. My face burns. All I can do is nod, hoping they realize it's a lie. The hermits glance between each other, but none question further. Xisuma just continues.

'Scar?'

'4?' Scar answers. He's not lying. So the Vex targeted me especially. They laugh as I realize drowning out Xisuma's voice completely, calling me good little Scar. obedient Scar. Won't fight us. Won't disobey. Model Vexling. Naughty Cub. Our Cub. Needs reminding. Needs punishment. Denies our fun. Refuses us control.

I stop breathing.

No.

The Vex stop me breathing.

They're taking over again.

I hear them screeching with laughter. I feel my throat constrict against my will until I can't speak. The meeting disappears to terror, vision slowly blacking. All I can do is keep clenching and unclenching my hand. I still have control. Mostly. Almost. Maybe. I can't breathe. I can't move my legs. Everything hurts.

A hand on my shoulder.

'...ub? Cub? What's going on?'

Scar's voice cuts through the Vex's. But I can't reply. I can't do anything.

'I'm fine.' The Vex force me to say. They're are going to take over again. Unless I stop them. How do I stop them? How do I tell Scar I'm not ok? How do I explain that I need help? Tears blur my vision as I realise I have no plans. I'm utterly hopeless. And now the Vex can attack the other hermits. And I'll have to watch.

Unless...

I can play dead.

Disassociate.

I empty my mind, as the Vex and the Jingler taught me to do. Even if the Vex let me breathe, I don't. I make myself go limp.

I collapse.

My head hits the ground.

And I fall unconscious.

:)