i miss you

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y/n age: 11

mom has been with travis at her shows and i haven't seen them in a while. i'm not able to go out in public with my mom because she doesn't want the media to know that she has a daughter. sometimes it feels like she's ashamed of me...

i've been staying with uncle austin and his girlfriend sydney and honestly they've felt more like parents than my mom has. don't get me wrong i love my mom but sometimes i feel like she doesn't really care for me as much as she should. but i know her keeping me from the media is for safety reasons as she says but i think it's also the fact that my mom had me at 23 and no one knows. she doesn't want the media to know she had a kid before marriage.

i've been missing my mom a lot though recently. i haven't seen her in about 2 months or so. we facetime but it's still not the same. it's also not all the time because she was spending time with her crew and travis.

"hey y/n you wanna go out and do something?" uncle austin said as he walked into the room i was staying in which was basically mine at this point.

"no i'm sorry...im just...not really up for it" i said.

"you okay?" he asked.

"yeah i just miss my mom..." i said.

"i know and im really sorry...i wish there was more that i could do" he said.

"i know and im really grateful for all that you do. i just wish mom would let the world know so i didn't have to live such a constricted life" i said.

"maybe i could talk to her about it. i mean you're starting to get older now..." he said.

"i don't know...i feel like mom will let them know when she wants. she's on top of the world right now and probably doesn't wanna ruin her image because of me..." i said.

"hey y/n don't say that..." he said.

"i know it's just sometimes i feel like...like i'm a burden to her. like it would just make her life easier if i wasn't her daughter you know?" i said.

"y/n i'm really sorry you feel that way but trust me your mom loves you very much" he said.

"thanks uncle austin" i said with a smile.

"it's what i'm here for!" he said. "oh also...would you wanna fly to munich to see some of your mom's shows?" he asked.

"yeah i would love to except for that fact that i have to stay in the dressing room and watch the freaking show from a tv..." i said.

"i think there are suites so you would be good in the suite i can double check though" he said.

"alright" i said with a sigh.

"hey don't beat yourself up kiddo" he said.

"i know..." i said.

"well me and syd are gonna go out you sure you're gonna be okay here?" he asked.

"yeah i'm sure..." i said.

"alright love you kid see you later" he said.

"alright bye! tell syd i said bye too" i said.

"will do!" he said as he walked out.

after i heard the door closed i grabbed my phone to facetime my mom. she was in hamburg right now and she had her last show there tonight. it was about 11am here so it was about 5pm there so mom was getting ready for her show. i facetimed her and it rang but she didn't answer. then i called tree who also didn't answer. lastly i called travis and he answered.

"hey y/n what's up?" he said as he answered.

"hey trav! um are you with my mom?" i asked.

"no i'm back in kc for training camp...is everything okay?" he asked.

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