Degrees of Desire (gxg, txs)

chapter forty nine

-Isabella

I've been giving Diana some time. I can't possibly imagine what she's going through right now. Despite everything going on in my life, I've never had to deal with the passing of my mother.

On Thursday, when we received the news, it absolutely killed me to not be able to go with Diana. She needed support and I had to stay back for my exams.

I was so worried about her the whole time because she shouldn't have driven in the state she was in. Despite her insisting she was fine, I knew deep down she wasn't.

When she broke down in my arms, it confirmed my feelings.

I managed to ask my calculus teacher, Mr. Thompson if I could take my exam early since I had a family emergency.

Luckily, he didn't care and I got all my exams done that same day. I couldn't wait the extra day to be with Diana. I wanted to be there for her.

After staying an extra hour after school, I headed back to the house to get a bag of clothes and made my way here immediately. I saw her location and immediately knew where to find her.

After the beach encounter, we all went back to her house. It was sort of late so Kate said she was going to bed and that left Diana and I alone. Her father couldn't be found.

It's been a few days, we've been here since Thursday. We had the whole week off for spring break so we didn't have to worry about missing school.

Diana's spent the past few days organizing her mother's service. She hasn't been to talkative but I couldn't really expect much considering everything she was going through.

Apparently, her mother left her some wishes she had for the funeral and Diana wasn't taking them lightly. She wanted everything to be perfect and would get extremely angry when something didn't turn out the way she wanted it to.

The funeral was tomorrow, Friday. We have these last few days before we unfortunately have to go back. It was tough trying to get everything together so quickly but Diana got it done.

Eleanor already had written down what she wanted ahead of time. She had picked out the casket and already purchased the land for her burial site at the local cemetery. She made everything fairly simple for Diana.

It saddens me to see how prepared she was for her impending death, but I have come to realize that it was all she could think about.

"Okay so everything is ready for tomorrow?" I heard Diana speak into the phone. "Okay. Got it. Thank you."

She sighs as she sat on the edge of the bed. It was late, she has been up since early this morning.

I've been trying to remind her to care for herself throughout the day. Just like how she would remind me to eat, I'd do the same because it was very easy for her to get caught up in something else.

I'd also make sure to try and get her to take small breaks. She's been focusing on small tasks and I'm sure a part of it is just her wanting to keep herself busy.

I crawled closer to her and hugged her from behind.

"Are we going to sleep now?" I asked softly, messing with the strings on her shorts.

"Yeah I'm sorry. I just have had so much going on. I'm sorry if I'm not giving you enough attention or time." Diana closes her eyes and rubs her temples.

"What. No! Don't worry about me, baby. I know you have so much going on." I said. "Do you want a massage?" I asked moving her hair to one side and rubbing her shoulders.