GETTING TO KNOW MS. ANGER | MaColet

26 NEED YOU

NICO

Agad akong nagshower, hoping the water would wash away not just the sweat, but also the heavy thoughts swirling in my mind.

Pero kahit anong pilit kong alisin ang mga tanong sa isip ko, paulit-ulit pa rin itong bumabalik, parang mga alon na hindi ko kayang pigilan.

Para bang sinasakal ako ng sarili kong isip.

Pagkatapos, humiga na ako, the bed offering little comfort as I stared blankly at the ceiling. I tried to empty my mind, but it was useless-those questions still lingered, taunting me in the silence.

Pilit kong ipinipikit ang mga mata, pero parang hindi mapakali ang isip ko.

Ilang sandali lang, narinig ko ang tatlong magkakasunod na notification sa phone ko. Bahagya akong napabalikwas at kinuha ito mula sa side table.

Pagbukas ko ng screen, napakunot ang noo ko sa unknown number na nag-text.

Pero hindi pa man ako natatapos mag-isip, bigla akong natigilan, confusion quickly faded as I realized who it was.

I don't know why, but she has this effect on me-like a storm you know is coming but can't outrun.

Parang may kung anong pwersa ang hinahatak ako palapit sa kanya, even when I should be pulling away.

My finger hovered over the screen, debating whether to reply or let it go.

Mas inuna ko pang palitan ang contact name niya bago ko naisipang mag-reply.

I set her name as "Maloi."

"Just got home." I typed, even though kanina pa talaga ako nakauwi. I wasn't even planning to reply, pero parang may sariling buhay ang mga daliri ko, pressing send before I could stop myself.

She wanted to call.

I started typing "ayoko." but my fingers hesitated. A part of me-gustong marinig ang boses niya.

We ended up talking, and she opened up about her mom. I found myself giving her advice. The conversation flowed naturally, hanggang sa napunta kami sa topic na gusto niyang makipagkita kinabukasan.

Sadly I said I have a part time job which is true.

Sinasama ulit ako ni Gwen dahil may utang pa ako noong last na pasok ko. Extra income din 'yon, so bakit hindi? Besides, bakasyon naman. And this afternoon, may first gig kami kasama sila Gwen at Mikha.

In the middle of our conversation, bigla siyang natahimik. I frowned, worried that she had fallen asleep.

"Maloi? You still there?"

But then, her soft voice broke the silence. "I'll sing for you na lang. Just give me a title of a song."

Napatigil ako. My mind went blank for a moment, but then a single song came to mind.

"Palagi" I answered, my voice almost a whisper.

I told her it was my favorite song, kahit na tatlong beses ko lang siyang narinig at nakanta sa isang gig namin noon.

Hindi kasi ako mahilig sa love songs-hindi yun ang brand ko. But for some reason, when she requested it, my tastes seemed to shift without question.

As she started singing, I felt myself relax.

Humiga ako nang patagilid, nilagay ang phone sa ibabaw ng unan katapat ng tenga ko, her voice filling the quiet room like a gentle lullaby.

The way she sang, it was like she was trying to comfort me, to reach out and hold me through the music.

My heart swelled with a warmth I hadn't felt in a long time, and I knew-kahit hindi ko gusto aminin-there was something different about her.