is this real? Milly and Matt #HouseoftheDragon

sudden desire (milly's pov)

Sudden Desire – Hayley Williams

I wanted him to kiss me how
With open mouth and open mouth
We keep our distance now
I wanna feel his hands go down
I try not to think about
What happened last night outside his house
Too far to go back now
Just wanna feel his hands go down

Sudden, sudden desire
Sudden, sudden desire
A sudden desire

Take the elephant by the hand and hold it
It's cruel to tame a thing that don't know its strength
But better to walk beside it
Mm, than underneath
My kind companion
Softens stone
My gentle giant
Painful reminder

Don't look in my eyes, I feel a sudden desire (sudden, sudden desire)
Don't know if I can deny a sudden desire (sudden, sudden desire)
Your fingerprints on my skin, a painful reminder
Don't look in my eyes, I feel a sudden desire (sudden, sudden desire)
A sudden desire

End of filming house of the dragon season 1, 2021...

I was alone at my hotel room in Portugal where we were about to wrap filming the half of the season I'm a part of and since the second part of the show has already been filmed before our first half, the filming of season 1 of house of the dragon is almost wrapped.

We had one scene left to film and for better or for worse my scene is with the one and only Matt Smith. We've been filming together since I got cast as young rhaenyra for the last 7 months and everything was going perfect until I stupidly started having feelings for him and I'm getting stressed by each day that passes because I'm sure he doesn't have any feelings for me. And I don't know how it happened or when exactly I started having these feelings for him but lately, haven't been able to sleep and I avoid him like a plague. We film our scenes, and we chat professionally but as soon as I'm free to leave the set I ran as fast as I can. I'm probably being super obvious to him and everyone else on set but to be honest I have only one scene left and my done here is done and I won't be seeing him until the show premieres and by then I truly hope this passes and we can go back being friends like we used to until my brain started malfunctioning.

My friendship and chemistry with him came super natural from the very moment we met and we filmed our first scene together and we have a lot of fun on set, rehearsals, we've gone out to dinner a couple of times alone and with the rest of the cast and crew and everything has been going smoothly but then I started feeling my stomach doing jumps every time we had to spend time together behind the scenes while the crew was getting a set ready to film the next scene and was around the time of us shooting the brothel scene in episode four. Matt asked me once if I was feeling okay when I needed to take a break between filming one particular scene and I felt so dumb because the least I needed and wanted was to look like an unprofessional 21-year-old Australian girl falling in love with her much older 38-year-old co-star.

"Mills are you sure you're okay?", matt asked while we were outside taking a smoke break.

"Yeah I'm okay. Just tired, more than I thought I was. And I'm a little nervous too, this scene is important, and I don't wanna disappoint anyone, you know?", I said and looked away anywhere but at him.

"You haven't disappointed anyone mills, it's normal to feel any kind of nerves. I feel them too. And you're doing great mills, we're gonna smash that scene."

"I hope so, I really do", I told him, and he smiled at me, and I had to look away one more time because that smile melted me, and I cannot afford to show my feelings away and ruin whatever friendship I formed with him over these last few couple of months.

Once we finished that talk, we went back to set, and my fucking nerves were under control and my gut controlled itself whenever I felt matt's hands on me as we were kissing as rhaenyra and daemon and the sparks I felt when we were kissing. I tried not to give myself away, but I don't know if he noticed, ignored it or didn't care. He was just sweet towards me and gave me a smile when we were done and covered my body with jacket when we were done and walked me to my trailer and we smiled at each other, and I told him thank you and goodbye.