tentative joy

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i don't know what to do with my hands even

when they're holding yours. they're like children

travelling alone without a ticket or a clue. maybe

that's how our bodies are made to make sense.

on farewell, your sari is as loose as it was on freshers.

i tuck it in, as i had tucked it in, like a flute in a mouth.

but this is a poem and this poem is our bed. the grammar

of your sorry can be loose here and give me head instead

of mind. my favorite parts of your body are the moments

before you come. like the insides of a bell. in the morning,

before you wake up, i roll four dots of odomos on you and

tuck you into a buzzless sleep charged with dreams. at night,

we go to the rooftop restaurant, from where the red dots

of taillights in the traffic take the shape of poetry's kind lies.

you get me a croissant and all i can taste is its pronunciation.

i'm either a hinge, or a pivot, or a tentative title. put me down,

when you have to, when you can, when you want, in a hive.

~ ajay

2/10/2024

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