Ally: no but I'm gonna come back to work whether I like it or not.
Tara: welcome back!!
Emily: guys it's only been like, 2 days, yall r acting like she's been gone a month lol
Elle: so?
Ally: lol ily elle
Spencer: Hi Ally!!
Ally: hey spence
Tara: u missed so much, bossman and derek r at each other's throats rn
Ally: wait what
Ally: like deepthroating or...
Emily: I just gasped
Elle: LMAO NO ALLY THEY'RE NOT GETTING ALONG RN
Tara: i'm going to piss myself omg LOL
Ally: oh...OH LMAO MY DUMBASS JUST WOKE UP I'M SO SORRY
Ally: I read that as 'in each other's throats'
Emily: LMAOOOO
Spencer: I'm glad to see your sense of humor back Ally :)
Ally: I'm glad u didn't take offense to my stupid ass spence :) if what I thought it said was true, I'd be throwing hands at derek ngl
Ally: even tho u cheated on me, i know ur not deserving of it
Spencer: Thanks Ally
Derek: ALLY UR BACK !!!
Derek: wait what
Tara: LOL
Ally: I misread what Tara said, sorry lol
Ally: but if u ever cheat on spencer ur going to deal with my fist in ur face :)
Derek: noted.
Rossi: Sono cosi felice di riaverti qui, Allison!
Ally: ...
Ally: David none of us speak italian
Ally: so simmer down with that shit, thank u lol
Rossi: ...
Rossi: welcome back...
Derek: nah u didn't have to come at rossi like that lmao
Hotch: Welcome back Ally.
Ally: so who wants to come over later to see Cleo
Garcia: omg did someone say Cleo? ME!!
Garcia: also welcome back Ally!!
Ally: Thank u penny <3
Elle: ME HOW IS SHE DOING??? IS SHE TALLER
Tara: Elle cats don't get taller.
Derek: fatter maybe
Ally: derek stfu
Rossi: Allison, Hotch was talking to you.
Ally:
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Ally: LOOK SHE'S STILL CUTE AND NOT FAT DEREK
Garcia: Yep definitely coming over later
Elle: ^
Emily: ^
Tara: ^
Spencer: ^
Hotch: Ally can you at least acknowledge that I exist?
Rossi: Remember what I told you Allison...
Ally: ugh fine, hey agent hotchner.
Ally: Better?
Rossi: we'll keep working on it.
Derek: damn she went for the professional name LOL
Garcia: hey Hotch have you spoken to JJ lately?
Hotch: Yeah, she finally let me come see Aubrey. I told her I'm beyond pissed at her for not letting me know she gave birth
Emily: as u should !!
Emily: does she ever mention any of the rest of us or??
Elle: that's what I wanna know lol
Ally: I hope not. yall need to remember how she treated me during that whole ordeal
Hotch: what about me?
Ally: Do u seriously want to get into this argument again??
Rossi: Guys enough
Spencer: Ally you literally defended Hotch during that entire thing and now you're basically taking back everything you said?
Ally: Did I say I'm taking everything back??
Elle: Guys no drama i'm BEGGING
Garcia: ^ please, happy thoughts only!!
Ally: fine. Anyway, Tara, Elle, Emily, Penny, Derek and Spencer can come visit Cleo later
Rossi: ??? what about me
Ally: fine, u can come too, only if u bring pasta
Rossi: Deal!
Hotch: Can I come?
Ally: idk.
Emily: Ally, it's just to see Cleo, let him come.
Ally: fine but don't expect me to have any sort of conversation with u agent hotchner
Hotch: ...
Rossi: Allison!
Ally: UR NOT MY DAD ROSSI IT'S MY CHOICE.
--
Derek: nah why is ally chugging down that wine like she's got dick in her throat
Garcia: DEREK XAVIER MORGAN
Emily: I cackled, derek wtf LMAO
Elle: inappropriate lmao
Spencer: DEREK.
Derek: spencer stfu lol
Hotch: Highly inappropriate. Someone get that bottle away from her
Tara: on it
Emily: how many has she had so far
Derek: one I think lol
Elle: Rossi HAD to bring the wine
Rossi: how was I supposed to know she'd be drinking it all??
Ally: thanks fer da wineh paps
Tara: she's out of it already wtf
Emily: Ally, babes, u only had one drink, u shouldn't be drunk
Ally: mabey i had 4
Elle: FOUR?
Hotch: What...everyone just got here
Ally: haha
Spencer: she has 4 empty bottles in her bag
Derek: ok but why didn't any of us realize that
Ally: becuaes im smart and u r not
Derek: at least I have MUSCLES.
Hotch: Dave...
Rossi: on it.
Rossi: give me your bag, Allison
Emily: not Ally running away lmaoo
Derek: don't trip ally wally
Derek: holy shit she just fell LMAO
Garcia: Derek Morgan it is not nice to make fun of a friend in this condition
Elle: now she's crying, someone help her up
Hotch: I've got her
Derek: u should let me help her, she isn't gonna want ur help
Tara: hm she doesn't seem to be pushing him away derek.
Derek: she's drunk and confused, she has no clue what she's doing.
Ally: plese more drink dfwfef
Tara: no drinks ally we r concerned about u
Spencer: lay her on the couch.
Ally: im fine totlly fuine
Hotch: I'm taking her to my place tonight. Jack's with Jessica until tomorrow afternoon
Derek: no let her come stay with me, she is not going to be happy when she's sober and realizes where she's at
Hotch: I can handle anything she throws at me. Besides this is a good chance for her and I to talk things through.
Derek: good luck. Make sure u wear something to shield ur face in case she literally throws something at u
Emily: lmao
Hotch: She won't.
Elle: no offense sir but u clearly didn't date ally long enough to actually know what she's capable of
Spencer: ^
Elle: same goes for u spencer lol
Hotch: I've known her long enough though. She'll throw one of her tantrums and then give me the silent treatment for like a day or two
Derek: if u say so
---
Ally: my fucking head hurts, everyone shut the fuck up now
Garcia: oh sweetie nobody was talking I'm afraid
Ally: penny ily but hush
Ally: wait where tf am I
Ally: oh hell no
Ally: who let me stay with agent butthead
Hotch: agent butthead? what are you, five?
Ally: someone come save me!!!
Elle: take some ibuprofen and u will feel better...soon.
Hotch: I got you water as well. Do not complain.
Ally: who died and made u boss
Hotch: Allison, do what I say please.
Derek: did she throw anything at u yet lol
Hotch: No, because like I said, I know her
Ally: hm what can I throw in here...
Ally: lol he fucking hid anything I can use to throw at him
Ally: even the remote, wtf i wanna watch tv
Hotch: I'm taking NO chances
Ally: can u take me home if ur not going to let me have fun here
Ally: this apartment describes u perfectly
Ally: boring af
Derek: I'm sorry but LMAO!! so true
Rossi: Allison...
Ally: he can cope or cry :)
Hotch: It's fine, Dave. Honestly she has a point
Ally: wait u weren't supposed to agree with me, ur supposed to be hurt, what in the sorcery is this
Hotch: I know in the long run you don't mean it, Ally. That's why I don't care what you say.
Ally: u don't know me
Hotch: Actually I do. You've got this personality thing going on to hide how you're really feeling on the inside: broken and angry. Someone in the past has hurt you to the point where you decide you needed to pretend to not care and hide your emotions and use this personality in hopes nobody can tell, but I can tell, Ally.
Ally: bro why tf r u profiling me for, this is nuts
Derek: it's probably the only thing he has to use against u
Elle: nah why did this get so real
Ally: ok so let me profile u agent hotchner
Ally: ur strict because u have daddy and mommy issues. They weren't good parents to u so u try to forget about your problems by trying to live a normal life. But u end up being a workaholic instead, resulting in ur wife leaving u. then u try to track down ur first ever case at the bau by going after the reaper and that resulted in ur wife dying. then u get dumped by beth because she knew deep down inside it wasnt working so she purposely accepted a job in another continent just to get away from u, and that resulted in u being alone, and then jj and u begin doing the dirty and then she cheats on u with her ex because she thought u were in love with me and now u broke up with me because u actually r not in love with me, u just didn't want to be alone but I annoyed u to the point where u couldn't take it anymore and here u r now, alone af and right now, u r at ur breaking point, figuring out what the hell u r doing wrong
Ally: am I close
Spencer: oh.
Tara: nah I ain't reading all that sorry babes
Emily: same lol
Derek: u should tho she tore him a new one LMAO
Rossi: Ally...I think you need to take a break from this chat.
Hotch: touché I guess
Hotch: Did that make you feel better, getting that off your chest?
Ally: actually yes lol
Hotch: So are we good? Can we work together now?
Ally: ya sure
Hotch: Great.
Ally: can u take me home tho
Derek: she wastes NO time
Ally: bitch I just need him to take me home so I can feel better
