All I could do was cry(completed)

Chapter 13

I looked Michael in his eyes as I could see his pain turn into anger.

Michael:"beyonce answer my question why did you do this to your wrist?"

Bey:"I didn't do it I got cut."

Michael hit my hand and I held in my scream I just squeezed my eyes shut because that not only hurt like hell but they were fresh cuts too.

Michael:"ok you got some hand sanitizer handy?"

I looked at him confused.

Bey:"second drawer to the left."

He pulled the hand sanitizer out the drawer and poured it on my arm I screamed to the heavens above.

Bey:"owwwwwwwwwwwww my wrist."

I feel to the ground holding my wrist wincing in pain.

Michael:"now lie to me again we have a full bottle right here why did you do this?"

I looked up at him with tears blurring my vision.

Michael:"answer the question cause if you say because of Jay I swear I'm betting some ass."

Well of course now I couldn't tell him the truth yes I'm mad at Jay but I still love him and is rather be hurt then to see him get hurt by someone other than me.

Bey:"get out of my house NOW!"

Michael:"it is that nigga that made you do this isn't it?"

Bey:"no get out of my house I don't wanna see you anymore get out fuck you."

Michael:"you don't mean that."

Bey:"yes the fuck I do get out."

Why do I insist on lying to the ones I love and causing them to leave me.He came over to pick me up but I didn't need his help.

Bey:"no back up away from me I got it you just get out of my house."

Michael:"can I at least tell jewel bye?"

Bey:"sure JEWEL!!"

She came running down the stairs as I pulled my sleeves down slowly so it didn't cause more pain.

Jewel:"yes momma?"

Bey:"tell me.ealy goodbye."

Jewel:"what why I still haven't eaten?"

Bey:"jewel now!"

They said their goodbyes to each other and after Michael left jewel had a little attitude.

Bey:"you better fix your face and that Attitude before I fix it for you."

Jewel:"shut up don't talk to me the guys I love you always end up pushing them away from me I loved Michael just as much as I loved daddy and now he's gone just like daddy what's wrong with you?"

I turned around and looked at jewel shocked that she spoke to me like that.

Bey:"I'm gonna let that slide cause your hurting but you wouldn't understand."

Jewel:"o I wouldn't understand ok well I understand that your a bitch to every man you meet that's why daddy cheated on you and that's why Michael left us your just a sad depressed light skin bitch."

I was now completely hurt that my child the thing I've loved all this time the thing I fought for just called me a bitch.

Bey:"get out!"

Jewel:"what?"

Bey:"I said get out since I'm such a bitch go walk to your fathers house."

Jewel:"mom I'm sorry I was just mad please don't do this."

By now she has started crying but I was over all the tears she hurt me beyond repair.

Bey:"if I were you I would get tha packing I'm calling your father now."

I got up and called Jay to come pick her up.

Jewel:"mommy I'm sorry stop I don't want to go with daddy I want to stay with you."

Bey:"no you don't you want to be in a family don't you?"

Jewel:"yes."

Bey:"well I'm not a family you said it your self I'm just a botch who drives men away right?Thats what you said so I'm sending you with your father so you can have a mommy a daddy and a sister."

By this point I was crying realizing that all this time I thought I was doing what was best for her and I was only harming her.

Jewel:"mommy stop you are my family we are a family."

Bey:"no we're not your a child who needs love and I'm a bitch that can't give it to you so go pack your bags your dads on his way."

She stopped fighting me and went to pack her things.Not to long after she went upstairs Jays horn honked and she came running down the stairs.I watched and made sure she got into the car safely and I mouthed to Jay "take care of my baby."He nodded his head and drove off.Jewel turned around in the back seat and I saw all the teas she had cried and all the ones she was about to cry and couldn't bring myself to know that I caused that but where she is going she will be better cared for because I can barley care for myself.I guess I'm not back I guess I'm just a broken girl trying to raise a child with a cheating father.I turned around and shut the door behind me.As soon as I shut the door I fell to the floor crying my eyes out.I couldn't contain myself.

Bey:"ahhhhh my baby is gone.Why did I have to be such a bad mom whyyyy."

I continued to sit there and cry for my life.I couldn't take it I ran into the kitchen and grabbed my car keys.I hopped into my car and drove to Jays house.Jay had his kitchen window open and as I was about to pull up I seen them eating together smiling and laughing having a good time.I smiled and drove back to my house.I walked in the house and fell onto my couch.This was it my baby was gone and so was my family.All I know is that I hope she is better off without me bringing men into her life and then taking them out because I'm unstable.I looked up to the sky hoping God would rely my message to jewel.

Bey:"mamas baby I hope your finally happy now."