Green Eyed Daydream #Wattys2016

Chapter 29

Carrie's POV

When I enter Lucia's I already know that Jonah is going to be irritated with me for being late. The small italian restaurant is not as busy as usual, so it's easy for me to spot my boyfriend pretty much immediately. He's texting on his phone when I approach.

"Hey," I greet him, taking a seat opposite of him.

"Oh, nice of you to join me," Jonah teases. "You did say 12:30, right?"

"Yes, I am sorry, but just as I was about to leave Kenneth asked me to show him some work, and I just couldn't get out of there," I lie.

Jonah, rolls his eyes, and puts his phone down on the checkered tablecloth. "Is Kenneth the perv who was bagging one of the exec chicks there?"

For a second I feel panicked. I never shared anything about Kenneth and Leona with anyone.

"How do you know about that?" I ask, trying to keep my voice low.

"Oh, corporate gossip travels, you know how it is. He hasn't tried to make any moves on you, has he?"

"No, of course not," I roll my eyes at him, secretly thinking...but someone else has. "Anyway, how was L.A.?"

"Fun. What did you do to keep yourself occupied?"

"Oh, you know, nothing much," I shift in my seat, feeling the guilt swell up inside of me.

The waitress arrives and we place our orders. I only order a small salad, since I can already feel my appetite disappearing.

"Good call on the salad," Jonah says. "You've been needing to lay off the pasta."

"What in the hell is that supposed to mean?"

Jonah makes a pained expression. "Please don't get all sensitive. I'm just saying, lay off the carbs, you know, make healthier choices, that's all. Bikini season is all year round as far as I'm concerned."

"I'm seriously considering changing my order to fettuccine alfredo if you don't stop with this topic right now," I warn him.

"Fine, whatever," he mumbles, and waves his hand dismissively.

Practicing what to say on the way here didn't do me any good. How do I even start?

"Guess what?" I decide to procrastinate. "Alex and Tiffany are going to move in together."

"Jesus, are you serious? What idiots," Jonah says, with a smirk.

"I thought we talked about being more kind when speaking about my friends," I remind him.

He just rolls his eyes. "I have to tell it like it is, Carrie. I can't think of a quicker way to ruin a relationship. Mark my words, not a month will go by, and they'll be done."

Okay, I can't take this any more.

"Jonah," I begin, after taking a deep breath. Jonah's phone vibrates and he takes it in his hand.

"Hold on," he says, not looking up from his phone. His thumbs keep working the keyboard, and I feel like snatching that stupid phone away from him and throwing it across the restaurant.

I take a sip of my water, and drum my fingers on the table, impatience eating away at me.

"I have to tell you something important," I say, and he looks very much annoyed, as he reluctantly puts down his phone.

"Yes?" he prompts me, folding his arms across his chest. 

I start to fidget with the napkin in my lap. "I've been thinking about us lately, and... It's just been on my mind a lot, and I... I think we need to--" Jonah cuts me off.

"Oh, dear god, here it comes," he says with an overly dramatic tone.

Does he really know what I'm going to say?

He leans closer to me across the small table. "If you think I'm going to ask you to move in with me, sweetheart, I'm sorry, but you're so wrong," he says with a smirk. "Living together is basically relationship suicide."

I can actually feel my blood start to boil.

"Okay, first of all, I think it's wonderful that Alex and Tiffany have found such a strong connection with each other that they want to share more of their lives together. I will not judge them by their choices simply because they differ from mine. As long as they are happy, I'll support them and be happy for them, because that's what friends do."

Jonah gives me a blank stare. "Christ, not another lecture about friendship."

"Secondly," I continue, feeling my anger building, "you're so arrogant to think that I'm here to beg you to ask me to move in with you."

"Well, aren't you? God, it's such typical female passive aggressive bullshit. Wasn't bringing up Alex and Tiffany just a ploy to open that topic?"

"No, you self-absorbed prick! I'm breaking up with you!" I yell. So much for being gentle.

Jonah's eyes widen with shock, and then he squints at me, as his lips form a hard line.

"Are you fucking shitting me right now?" he spits.

I make myself lower my voice. "We're done. I'm breaking up with you."

"Because I'm not asking you to move in with me?"

"No, Jonah, because you're an asshole."

"Oh, I see..." he pauses, his grey eyes look menacing. "You never got over the New Year's eve thing, is that it? I gotcha. Well, then maybe you're right, Carrie. Maybe you're way too uptight for me."

"This has nothing to do with that. Or maybe it does. Maybe we should have ended it back then, but I know now, without a shadow of a doubt, that there is no future for us as a couple."

Jonah's face is unreadable. He's just staring at me in silence. "You're going to regret this for the rest of your life," he says finally.

"I hope not," I say.

The waitress brings over our food.

"Bring over the check, will ya?" Jonah says to her, giving her a wink. He then produces his thickly stacked money clip, throws down a couple of twenties on the table, and says, "Some time very soon you're going to come to your senses, Carrie, and realize what a giant fucking mistake you just made, but don't bother crawling back...that ship has sailed, sweetheart."

Jonah gets up and walks out, leaving me alone at the table.

After a few minutes, I feel my heart rate resume its normal pace, and I try to assess my emotional state. The breakup conversation definitely didn't go how I envisioned it, but I suppose it could have been worse. Could have gotten a drink tossed in my face, or been called a 'bitch', or some other horrifying insult. As unpleasant as it was, I really don't feel sad, or upset, I don't even feel like crying. Surprisingly, I feel liberated, unburdened, but most of all...relieved that it's over.