blue | a collection of tronnor oneshots

Too Late

     Prompt: Connor likes Troye but is afraid of rejection

There's a day in everyone's life where things become simultaneously more clear and more confusing all at once. The first day of the second semester of junior year was this day for me. All because of one boy by the name of Troye.

I have goals like Troye, and I have ambitions like Troye. My eyes are also bright and my hairs just as messy, something that has been pointed out several times before. We're best friends, both openly gay and seemingly attractive. We're attached by the hip and are well known at our school. I have fun like Troye and I get lost in the moment as easily too.

One thing we don't have in common though, one thing that used to have no significance to me, is that he feels deeper. Troye will get high off of one single emotion and talk about It for days while mine dissipates as soon as I walk threw the threshold.

Now, it's no secret that I'm obsessed with the blue eyed boy, have been since kindergarten when I found out he also prefers superman to batman.  We're inseparable and have been since forever, we gave each other our everything's. The best of friends since the beginning of time. Until we weren't. At least to me we weren't. It all changed on the first day of that second semester when Troye came over after school to study.

I was sitting on my bed, Troye laying next to me and he was complaining. The schools uniform was his worst nightmare, to tight and to tacky. He asked for something to wear and I rolled my eyes, pointing to the dresser in front of me. Then I looked back down to the biology paper on my lap, my glasses sliding down slightly, and Troye said something that was so irrelevant that I don't even remember what it was. I looked up. I stopped breathing.

Now I've seen Troye naked several times before, and he wasn't even relatively naked at the moment, but something was different. Suddenly we weren't just best friends and as he pulled the t-shirt over his head, droning on about something Tyler previously said I froze.

His stomach wasn't just another body part and his hips weren't just necessary bones. He was there, really there, and he was attractive. I had always known this, been aware of his looks, but never in this way. Never in a way that made me nervous.

That's the day. The day it all changed and everyone noticed it. The extra glances, hugs that last to long, hands lingering. But silence was easier, simpler, less painful. But it was toxic, and now on the first day of the second semester of  Senior year no one even remembers it. But I do. I remember every time Troye changes in the locker room and every time he smiles. I love him. And he's oblivious.

Now I watch him from my bedroom window as he walks up my front porch and into the house without knocking. Seconds latter my bedroom door swings open and Troye stands there with a grin that I return.

"Con you're never going to believe this." He says hastily and out of breathe. "I ran all the way here to tell you." I laugh at him.

"I swear if this is about Beyon-"

"It's not I promise." He giggles. "It's even better." My eyes widen.

"Better than Beyoncé? What did we find a cure for cancer?" Troye rolls his eyes and sighs.

"No Franta we did not. But shut up, I have news." I smile fondly at him and decide that today is the day. The day I tell him I love him.

"What is it? Hurry before you explode." Or I do.

"Joey Graceffa just asked me out! Me!" He practically screams in excitement and my smile drops. Oh, that's unfortunate. Joey Graceffa is another popular kid at our school. Attractive, sweet, good guy. Wouldn't hurt a fly.

"And you said?" Of course I know what he said. He probably said what any sane gay boy would of. Any sane gay boy but me. Because I'm totally obsessed with the one in front of me. He gives me a confused look, almost like he can't believe what comes out of this mouth next.

"I said no." I choke on my own spit.

"What? Why?" I ask and he grins that grin that makes me melt.

"Because I like someone else." His eyes glow with something other than their usual blue and my heart starts to beat uncomfortably.

"who?" A smirk covers his suddenly more apparent lips as he swings his arms teasingly.

"I think you know who." I shake my head even though I have an idea. I'm just afraid of  being wrong. Afraid of rejection.

"I-I really don't."

"I'll give you hints." He giggles. "He's got green eyes." He takes a step toward me. "He's really good at swimming and has all the boys falling to their knees just for a glance." when he takes another step I squeeze my eyes shut. This can't be happening. But I don't want it to stop.

"Mhm." I mutter when I hear him take that final step and can feel his breathe on my face.

"He's my best friend." His entire existence become ten times more daring as he is basically pressed against me. "He's standing right in front of me." There's no room for rejection now but the fear is still present and as numbing as ever. "Do you know who now?"

"I have an idea." I whisper, surprised and proud that I don't stutter. He laughs that cocky laugh he's had for years and I quite literally swoon, my knees knocking against he's.

"So, how do you feel about it?" Suddenly Troye isn't that self aware, confident, cocky guy he's always been around others but instead that other side. The insecure and nervous side that I've had the pleasure of seeing for years.

"Scared." I say honestly, opening my eyes to see his flatering smile. "But warm."

"Warm?"

"Yeah, like unwanted butterflies and that uncanny heat forming in my cheeks." He giggles.

"Your such a poet Con." Then he grabs my hand and the reality of the situation gets ten times more real.

"does this mean...we're like.." I trail off, looking away from his eyes to the window next to us.

"Dating? Only if you want to." An embarrassed and happy smile finds my face and I nod quickly. Of course I want to. I have since last year, I think to myself. "So...does that mean I can kiss you?" a  nervous giggle escapes my lips as I nod again.

"Yes." I close my eyes once more and I can feel his full lips move against mine as he speaks.

"Connor?" Suddenly I'm cold. My eyes shoot open and there's Troye, standing just inside my door wearing that grin that still makes me melt.

"Yes?"

"I saaaaaid, Joey Graceffa asked me out today!" Oh, that's unfortunate.

"And you said?" Of course I know what he probably said, he probably said what any sane gay boy would of said. Any sane gay boy but me.

"Yes of course! I can't believe he actually likes someone like me.." Troye goes on about Joey and how amazing things have turned out and I just smile. There he is, my Troye. And he's extravagant.

And I'm to late.

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A/N

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