Dear Nick

About Last Night

I woke up & saw Demi standing by the bed, pulling her pants on & I smiled at the sight, since it reminded me of the night before, when we made love. I sat up on my elbow & smiled at her, even though she wasn't aware I was awake yet. "Damn... you're dressed already." I said, my voice gruff.

She looked alarmed when she looked at me, then she gave me a weird smile. "Yea, I've been up for a little while."

"You don't have to get dressed, ya know?"

"Yea, I do." She replied simply, buttoning her pants.

"You got somewhere to be?"

Her eyes met mine & she inhaled, slightly, then her shoulders collapsed. "Joe's coming over in a bit so we can talk."

I saw up straighter, getting angry again & seeing her eye was a reminder of why I was angry. "For what? So you can tell him to never talk to you again? Then... you can get undressed & get back in bed with me?" I lifted my eyebrows, but she frowned & I felt my heart sink.

"Nick... about... last night...this... " Her hand waved between us & sighed as her eyes looked up for a moment, before she looked back at me. "What happened last night can't ever happen again."

"Why?"

"Because I don't have those kinds of feelings for you. I was drunk & I guess tequila makes me horny. I mean you're a really good kisser, so I just got extremely turned on. It will not happen again." Demi said in a soft voice, but it didn't help to soften the blow to my ego or my heart.

I swallowed & glanced away, not wanting to look at her face or I was afraid I'd burst into tears. "So it was a mistake?" My voice shook, even though I tried to control it.

Demi shook her head & sat on the bed. "No, I would never call it a mistake, Nick. I knew what I was doing, even though I was drunk. It's just... it can't ever happen again because I don't see a future, like that, with us. I wouldn't ever want to ruin our friendship by pursuing something that I don't feel would ever happen."

"Even though we both enjoyed ourselves last night & clearly both wanted that to happen... you don't think there is something there? Something worth pursuing?" I asked, watching her face, closely.

She shook her head, frowning. "No, I'm sorry. I was just really turned on... I mean Jesus, Nick, you're a good kisser, but it was purely physical. There's nothing else there for me. I'm not willing to risk our friendship, our close relationship for some good sex."

I sucked in my bottom lip & glanced down. "I get it."

"I don't want this to ruin our friendship or make things awkward between us. Can we just forget it happened? I know I can. Can you do that? Can you forget it happened?"

I nodded, knowing damn well I wasn't going to be able to actually forget that happened. I wasn't sure that our friendship was going to remain the same or that things wouldn't be awkward, but I'd do my best. "Nothing happened. We got drunk & went to bed." I looked into her eyes when I said the 'went to bed' part & she looked down, quickly.

"And can you please not tell Joe? Or anyone else for that matter?"

I sighed, deeply, feeling my insides twisting up, hearing Joe's name. "I won't tell Joe."

"Thank you." Demi stood up. "I'm going to go take a shower, since Joe will be here soon."

Demi & I stared at each other, for a moment & when I didn't say anything, she turned & left the room. The second I heard the bathroom door close, I hit the bed with my fist, then took several deep breaths. I was trying to keep my emotions in check, because I was feeling so many different ones. I sat there composing myself for a moment, then got up & pulled on shorts & a tank top. I headed out to the kitchen & just after I turned on the coffee maker, there was a knock on the back door. I opened it & had to count to ten in my head when I saw Joe standing there. He didn't wait for me to invite him in, he just sauntered in past me.