Dear Nick

The Dance

Demi's wide eyes confused me, then she started shaking her head at me. "Nick... I don't think.... we can't... "

Suddenly, I heard, in my head, what I had said to Demi & her wide eyes finally registered to me. I sat my drink on the nightstand & chuckled, shaking my head in disbelief. "Oh, my God... no. Demi... I didn't mean... I meant just actual sleeping."

"Oh." Demi said as her face turned red, then she started laughing, nervously.

"You thought I was asking you to have sex with me...." My head fell back as I laughed, even harder than she was laughing.

She pretended to be offended that I was laughing, so I pressed my lips together to try to stop. "Well...uh... you were talking about it being your wedding night... how we've done it before... being weird for me..." She said with an eye roll.

I covered my mouth, still shaking my head. "Sleeping in the same bed is what we've done before... that's what I was talking about." I couldn't help myself & started laughing pretty hard. Demi joined me, thankfully, as she sat on the bed. Our laughing was the only thing that I could hear & it was an amazing sound. The more I laughed, the harder it was to stop & it felt incredible.

Once Demi & I stopped laughing, minutes later, we looked at each other & I sighed. "I haven't laughed that hard in over a month & it felt really good."

Demi nodded her head as she brought the glass to her mouth. "It did." She took a sip.

I started snickering again, then took a breath before I spoke. "So... are you okay with sleeping in bed with me? I just really can't deal with an empty space next to me tonight. I won't sleep if I'm alone, because I won't be able to stop thinking about the fact that it was supposed to be my wedding night. I know it's a lot to ask & I'll understand if you want to sleep on the couch."

Demi shook her head, making a face. "Nick... I'm fine with it. I mean we haven't had sex in almost two years & we have slept in the same bed before. We're both adults." She slid off the bed & went around to the other side, where she put her glass down. She took off her shoes, then slid under the comforter & leaned on the headboard. "But... I'm not tired. What do you say we polish off this bottle of wine & see if we can laugh some more?" Demi held up her glass with one eyebrow up, grinning at me.

I smiled, sliding under the comforter myself, then reached for my wine & held it up. Demi touched her glass to mine, making a clink sound. "I think that sounds like a fanfuckingtastic idea." I smirked as I brought the glass to my mouth. Demi & I finished the bottle of wine & managed to find things to laugh about, mostly funny memories from our past. Once the wine was finished, I scooted down so I was lying in bed & I tucked an arm under my head. "Thanks again, for today. I honestly don't know how I would have made it through if you hadn't been here. I would have felt like I was dying all day from the pain."

Demi moved down so she was lying beside me, a little distance between us. "That's what friends are for. I'm glad I could help today, be a little less painful."

I smiled, staring at the ceiling. "Our wedding would have been beautiful." I said, in a soft, thoughtful tone.

"Mmmm hmmm."

"Did you see her dress?"

"Yea, I was with her when she picked it out."

I took in a deep breath. "Where is it now?"

"I think Lydia took it back to the shop." Demi answered in a quiet voice.

"Damn. I wanted to see it."

"Nick, don't torture yourself. One day you will get married & you don't want to have memories creeping into your head that day, tainting your actual wedding day."