Soldier

Chapter 47: Alex

After he had said that, everyone rejected his idea immediately and started to shout at him, except me and Kairi. I can't say I agree with his idea either. It's wrong. We can't sit here and do nothing...

The kid rolled his shoulders and shouted,

"Shut the hell up, all of you!"

The others immediately ceased to oppose and backed off from him slightly, as they sat back down in their seats. The kid shook his head, then calmed himself with a deep breath.

"Don't all of you get it? What can we do? Huh?! What! Tell me, damn it! Are we going to risk our lives because we are expected to? Are we going to play our role as pawn? Will we go out there and fight for a country that wouldn't even care if we died? Tell me! We all heard that last transmission; no one is coming to get us!!! We were sacrifices for peace... THEIR PEACE!"

The kid slammed the table with his face. Another person, sitting next to him, stood up and asked him,

"You're a ghost aren't you, Kal?! Best of the best from the school, right? What have you to worry about? And what-"

The blond haired guy named Kal (the kid) chuckled in response. He covered his face with his hands, then wiped it off.

"I don't want anyone else to die..."

His voice cracked up.

"Don't you get it?! Why should we fight...? There are forty of us, and god knows how many of them. We are literally inside their territory! It's hopeless. We would die within the first ten minutes!!!" Kal shoved his plate off the table, and spilt his food onto the floor. His plate crashed into pieces of china, sliding across the floor.

The room became silent for a moment. The other person sat back down into his seat, unwilling to say anything else.

Kal pulled out a rolled up picture that looks neatly kept, from his back pocket. He threw it onto the open space of the table in front of him.

Its a picture of a girl, who looks a lot like him. Maybe his sister? The girl is standing against a white fence, smiling at the camera. She is wearing a long grey skirt, and an expensive looking jacket made of leather. She has a farmer's hat on with a small feather on top. There is writing on the side of the picture: "Please come home; Love, your darling, Ann."

Kal took the picture caringly back into his hands after everyone saw it and stuffed it back into his pocket. He's worried, and he's scared. I can tell by that look in his eyes. I've seen that before...

Kal continued,

"You see...? I've got something to live for,"

Kal pointed at Regi,

"You have something to live for,"

He pointed at me,

"He has something to live for, we all do. Would you risk losing that...? Over nothing...?"

Kal put his hands down again.

"Risk losing what's important? What is our purpose then?"

Regi asked back, from across the table.

"What is our sole purpose here for? Why have people died? Why are we the ones who got to live?"

Kal stayed silent as he clenched his teeth, and stared at the table.

I've had enough of this. I can't take this anymore. No more arguing. I stood up from my seat. Everyone suddenly looked at me.

What am I doing? I am no leader; I've never been a leader. But what am I supposed to do... I've got to stand up already. If I don't, we will never decide... and nothing will get done

"Enough. All of you."

Kal turned his glance at me.

"Why? What are you doing? You should know better than most of the people here at this table, why we should not do anything."

"Because it's wrong. We can't let Willis and everyone else have died for nothing... I have my own beliefs, my own Ideals. I believe in my friends and my family, and I believe that I have to protect them." Kal stared at me confused.

"What doe-"

"But I can't do that while we hand over our very lives to these people... To the creators. Hell, I'm not even sure why they are called creators anymore, why we are called soldiers, why we are still alive. What have we worked for? Why do we protect each other if not to protect those we love? It isn't about fighting for our country anymore! Will you just stand by while he, the leader of the Creators, destroy everything and makes it his own? Or will you stand up and fight for a better tomorrow. Where we will have done something with our lives. Where we protected everyone!"

I can't believe I'm saying this. What am I doing? Why am I doing this!? But I can't stop now. It's too late for that...

"Get it Kal? We are soldiers. It doesn't mean we are loyal dogs to some government or whatever the hell's worrying you! And I'm scared, I'm scared that I... that Kairi... that no one here will make it! I'm scared, just like everyone else is. We have lived for what we believe in. Without our beliefs, or family, or our friends, we are nothing! We cannot let the world fall into destruction now... We are here to protect what we hold close, and as long as the threat is there, we will never be able to find happiness with ourselves for not being able to prevent it!"

Kal got angrier. He popped his knuckles on the wood table as a loud crunch sound came from them.

"So what then?! Still risk our lives, huh?! Are we that useless... are our lives that forfeit! I didn't want to be a soldier; I didn't want a war, none of it!!!! I wanted a nice quiet life at a happy home... to live a normal life. To live with my love, my partner... maybe have a few kids.... Was it so hard to ask?! We have been abandoned by our own superiors. They don't care about us. And god isn't helping us either. What do we do... when we all are going to die!"

Kal tried to rush me from across the table, and jumped onto the table to get to me. Three of the others held him back before he stopped. I took a step back. He doesn't even know. He doesn't know anything about pain and loss. He doesn't know...

"Abandoned? Heh, you don't even know the meaning. You're wrong, Kal. We can do what's right. We can set our hearts right. Set ourselves on a good path. We don't have to follow anyone but ourselves. Everyone here, is together in this. All we have is each other. And you know what Kal? God watches and observes us to see what we choose for ourselves. He can't simply do everything for you, or me, or anyone. Our choices are what matter. Our emotions, our feelings, they all matter. Trust in your heart and see what you believe. All we got here are each other, Kal. Each and every last one of us fight for something. Together, we are something, together we are strong, but divided we will fall and everything we love is going to be taken away from us. You don't have to fight, none of you do... and I don't have the right to ask this of you. But we are soldiers, and we have to do what's right."

Kal shook off the others holding him off his shoulders and sat back down.

The room grew quiet. Finally. I finished. I've never felt more nervous than just now. My body is pulsing. My hands are clammy. Why is everyone quiet...?

Regi suddenly asked me,

"Then what's our plan? You are our leader now, Alex. If you truly think we should fight, if you believe we have a chance, I say we follow you. Anyone object?"

No one said anything to answer.

"Good. What are your orders, sir?

Regi stood up and saluted me,

"Because I will fight with you."

One by one everyone else stood up to do the same thing.

What are they doing?! Me? A leader?! Can I do this...? I didn't want to be a leader. I-I wasn't-it's too late to back out. They are looking up to me. I brought them into an entirely different mess then before. Once I stood up... I took the responsibility of whatever happened... I need to make sure, everyone gets out alive. If they are going to follow me... It's my responsibility.

I looked at Kairi, who stood in a salute with a bright smile on her face. She nodded her head at me. She is my reason. That's all I need. Alright. Let's do it.