You Are My Sunshine (Jakesy)

I Love You More

                 

A/N: Thank you all so much for the votes and comments on the last chapter, it really means a lot that you like what I'm writing. I hope you like this one too.

I swear this is the fiftieth dress I've tried on today, in reality it's only the fourth. I'm really just not in the mood today; I'm so exhausted. I just wanted to go home but the girls organised for us to go wedding dress shopping after our radio interview this morning.

I walk out to the girls and stand on the small podium in the middle of the room.

I hear Perrie gasp, "Jesy! You look absolutely stunning."

"You've literally said that about every dress today" I reply flatly.

"I know" she sighs, "well you do look gorgeous in them all but the lace on this one, wow!"

"Well, unfortunately for you, I don't think this is the one. I don't think any of these are the one" I sigh and step off the podium.

"That's okay, there's literally hundreds of other dresses here to choose from" Leigh-Anne smiles hopefully.

"You know what, I'm really not feeling well, do you mind if we leave?" I say, feeling both physically and mentally drained.

Jade stands up and walks towards me "Is everything okay Jes?" she asks cautiously.

"Yeah, yeah, everything's fine" I lie and try to fake a smile.

I know I can tell the girls anything and they'd totally understand, I just don't want to talk right now.

"Alright..." Jade replies slowly, raising an eyebrow. I can tell she sees straight through my fake smile, she always does. I look down and avoid eye contact with her, hoping she'll just leave it, luckily she does.

"No worries," I hear Perrie say, "you go get changed and we'll meet you out the front."

"Thanks" I walk back towards the dressing room and change as quickly as I can; I just want to get home.

- THAT NIGHT -

"You alright, love?" Jake asks as he sits beside me on the couch, "you've been quiet ever since you got home, which means something's up" he adds.

"I'm fine, just a little exhausted" I pray that he believes me; not that it's a lie, I am exhausted, just much more than a little.

"Okay, well I'm going to go to the Indian restaurant to pick up dinner and after we've eaten we can have an early night. Sound good?" he says before giving me a peck on the cheek.

"Sounds good" I fake smile.

Jake gets up and picks his keys up off the counter before blowing me a kiss and leaving out the garage door.

"Great, now I'm by myself for at least 15 minutes" I say aloud to no one but myself.

I decide to take a shower. Hopefully it will distract me.

I get out of the shower and just throw on one of Jake's shirts. I walk over to my side of the bed and lay down, looking up at the ceiling. I lay there for what feels like hours but is probably only a few seconds before I feel something warm run down the side of my cheek. When I realise they're tears it only makes me cry harder. I roll onto my side and look at the picture of Jake and I that is hanging on the wall. I'm so lucky to have him in my life, great, now I'm just sobbing uncontrollably. This is one of those times where everything seems to hit all at once. My body continues to shake violently and I feel like I've been hit by a truck.

"Baby, what's wrong?" I hear Jake call. I hadn't even heard him get home. He rushes over to me and sits down beside me on the bed.

I try to talk but I can't. I can't breathe. I'm crying so hard that I'm hyperventilating.

Jake sits me up, "Jes, Jes, look at me."

I look into his perfect blue eyes and my breathing instantly slows down.

"That's it, just breathe with me" he says calmly.

He takes a deep breath in and I follow, he waits a few seconds before slowly exhaling and again I follow. My eyes still haven't left his.

"Perfect" he smiles.

He continues to breathe slowly with me and wipes the tears from my face.

"Baby, what's wrong?" he tries again.

"I-I-I'm... It's j-just... Why can't I form a bloody sentence?!" I yell the last part and cry harder.

"Hey, hey, hey, it's okay." he kisses my temple, "Jesy, I need to ask... are you pregnant?" he says sounding a little worried.

"No, of course not, Jake, why would you ask such a stupid question!" I snap, instantly regretting it. "I'm sorry" I bury my face in my hands and continue to sob.

"It's fine," he says, lifting my chin up until my eyes met his "just take your time."

I take a deep breath. "I'm just so exhausted, Jake. The girls and I haven't stopped doing appearances and interviews to promote the new album, I literally just got back from Australia and we're already preparing for the Japan trip next month and on top of all that I'm supposed to find time to plan a wedding" I take another deep breath and can't help but break down again.

Jake pulls me into a tight embrace; he holds me close and rubs circles into my back.

"Jesy, sweetheart, it's going to be alright. Shhh" he soothes, "Shhh, you're okay, just breathe" he whispers as he moves back to kiss my forehead; he knows that always calms me down.

"I love you" I manage to say.

"I love you too, more than you'll ever know" he replies softly, kissing my forehead again.

I look into his eyes as he starts speaking again. "I see how hard you work and I know it's difficult but I also see how much joy it brings you to perform for all the fans. You are the strongest and most passionate person I have ever met, I know you'll get through this, I've seen you do it before. As for the wedding, I want you to stop planning."

"What? Why?" I ask, shocked.

"Jes, I will love you no matter what! I don't need a slip of paper to make me love you. Of course I want to get married so I can finally call you my wife but I'm not in a hurry. I would call you my fiancé for another ten years if it meant you were happy. I never, ever want our love to cause you stress and if that means waiting a while to get married then that's perfectly fine with me" he smiles and I cant help but kiss him.

"I don't know what I did to deserve you" I whisper, centimetres from his face.

"I ask myself the same thing every single day" he kisses my tear stained cheeks. "Do you want dinner?"

"Can we eat it in here? I really don't feel like getting out of bed" I say, picking up my hairbrush and brushing my hair.

"Of course, anything for my queen! I'll go get the food while you choose a movie" he says before standing up and walking towards the door.

"Jake" I call before he exits the room.

He turns around, "Yes, sweetheart"

"I love you" I grin.

"I love you more" he smiles back, before walking downstairs.

A/N: Next chapter will be up on Wednesday