He's Kinda Hot// Calum Hood

Chapter 29~ Goodbye for good

*2 Months later*

"Bye Adam, I love you. If you ever need anything just let me know, i'm serious" i said hugging my little brother before walking through the gates to get on my flight back home.

"Bye big Sis ill miss you." 

*skip through the boring flight*

My plane landed at 10 in the morning in Australia. As promised I texted Ashton everyday. He didn't tell me much about Calum, all he said was he was being taken care of, and i settled for the answer. I missed him more then I had expected. I had texted Ashton and Bailey that my flight had landed and I would be at the gates in about an hour after I got all of my stuff. From what I knew they were still together. My dad was concerned for my well being as any parent would be whose child flew half way across the globe without a second thought. Everyone knew about my denial to Calum and I knew i'd come back and look the biggest bitch that ever lived.

I managed to get my bags to the gate, with little trouble. 

"Megan!" 

I looked around until my eyes spotted my sister. Where was Ashton though?

"Hey Bailey, umm don't get me wrong I love that you're here, but wheres Ashton?" I asked hugging her.

"Oh umm he said he had to do something this morning that came up last minute so he had asked me to come pick you up. He said he should be done by the time we get back though." She said walking towards the exit.

"Oh okay. Thanks again for picking me up. Umm hows he doing?" She knew exactly who I was talking about.

"Umm hes better then he was when you first left he was awful, but uh hes doing better... i guess" she said. before i could question it she was already out of the car walking up the driveway.

"Thanks for the help Bailey" I said sarcastically getting my bags out of the back of her car. I opened the door to the lights all off. I turned them on and just about peed my pants at everyone jumping out yelling 'Surprise'.

I looked around the room to see all my friends. I ran up to my dad first and hugged him super tight.

"I missed you so much."

"I missed you too dad."

I looked around more and saw Ashton. I ran over and jumped in his arms, wrapping my arms and legs around him.

"I missed you so much Ash." I said tears in my eyes. I feel like anyone who didn't know us would think we are a couple but NO we are not.

"I missed you too." he said squeezing me. 

I walked around giving hugs to everyone else there, but there was one person missing.

"So he decided not to come huh?" I asked them, on the verge of crying. they all looked around at each other and gave me a look of sympathy. I don't want their damn sympathy I want Calum. I turned towards the steps, running up to my room. I opened the door to reveal just the person I was looking for.

"Calum" I breathed.

"Hey" he said obviously faking a smile. He looked like he had lost a lot of weight, and he surely hadnt gotten much sleep.

"I'm so sorry" I said crying. I just stood there, not knowing whether to walk up to him and hug him and kiss him and pretend everything was okay, or stand there cry because lord knows I deserved it.

He walked over to me, cautiously wrapping his arms around me, letting me cry into his chest.

"Can we talk?" he said pulling away after a couple minutes.

"Of course" i wiped my eyes with my sweater sleeves. "I'm sure you have a lot of questions" I said quietly.

"Yeah I do. But ill just take it one at a time. So first, why did you say no?"

"Because i was scared." I couldn't look him in the eye. the minute i did i knew i would start crying again. I was so horrible to him and i hate myself every second for it.

"What were you scared of? We loved each other and we had been together so long and I wanted to spend my life with you. What scared you to the point of leaving the country?" he was still so calm, i didn't understand how he could be.

"You're saying everything in past tense. We loved each other, you wanted to spend your life with me. Do you not feel that way anymore?" I finally looked at him and he looked down. In that moment I realized I screwed up my entire life by leaving. I lost the most important person in my life by leaving the country. "So the real reason you're asking me this is for closure, not because you feel that way anymore." I said, completely astonished.

"That's not fair, you cant turn this on me. Answer my question! What the hell were you scared of?"

"I was scared that id end up like my damn parents. I don't want my future kids to have to go through that, okay?" I yelled.

"But if you never went through that we never would've met! Everything happens for a reason!" he yelled back.

"That doesn't mean it made it any easier on me, or my brother! You think it was meant to be that we would be in a screaming match the day I get back over the same thing that made me leave in the first place? You think that was meant to be?" I yelled back. We were in an all out screaming war.

"I think it was meant to be that we met in the first place. I think it was meant to be that I fell in love with you. I think it was meant to be that I asked you to marry me, but obviously you didn't think so." He said trying to leave the room. I stood in front of the door.

"If you still love me as much as you say you did, you will stay here and let me explain. Then if you still want to leave me, I wont stop you." I said looking him in the eyes.

"Fine, explain." he said walking over to sit on my bed. I decided it was a good idea to stay standing.

"I said no because my parents got married young, they had kids young, and they got divorced. You have no idea how bad it was. My brother was 10 and i was 13. They had made it through 15 years of marriage before they decided they were done, and i made the most selfish move ever and left my brother with my mom instead of taking him here with me. My biggest fear in life is to end up like my parents. The reason I left was because I needed to get away to clear my head. I knew Madison was going home, and I hadn't seen my brother in nearly 2 years. I had missed his birthday for the first time ever and I was upset about that too. Don't think for a second you weren't on my mind the entire time i was there because you were. I kept asking Ashton how you were doing and the only thing he would respond to me was 'hes fine'. I didn't text you myself because i assumed you never wanted to talk to me again after what I had done. I am the most awful person on the face of the planet. I was so horrible to you, and I know you probably cant forgive me, but I still love you more than you can understand, and I am so sorry for the horrible way I had treated you." 

"I forgive you" he said standing up. He kissed my lips hard and full of passion before pulling away, "But that doesn't mean I can forget. Goodbye, Ill always remember you as my first love."

And with that, he left the room, leaving me there speechless with the last unbroken part of my heart shattered. There were no tears left to cry, so I didn't. I sat on my bed, facing the wall, thinking about everything I could've done differently.