Utaites X Reader

Seashell of the past (Itou Kashitarou x Reader)

Clutching the dulled (colour) shell in hand, you looked into the far ocean, upon the horizon, there stood a memory, a memory of that day, that dark day,with gloomy skies threatening rain and quiet winds as in mourning.
Clutching the sheel tighter but cautious not to break it, tears fell down your cheeks as the memories came back, more and more, not realising you were walking deeper and deeper towards the horizon until the water touched your hands.

'Eh? Since when did I get here..? I should go back before its too late, (someone precious to you name //IM SORRY FOR KILLING THEM IN THIS STORY ;-;//) would not want to see me as i am now,would they? The me now is pathetic, if they see me now... they would be disappointed.' Just as you turned back to face the shore, darkness.

You could feel the water around you, feel the wind blowing in the crisp evening air,yet, before you was emptiness. You could still feel,hear,touch,smell, and see, but all you could see was emptiness,nothingness, a dark void. You tried to scream but no sound came out, you tried to move but your body frozen.

"OI! WHAT ARE YOU DOING OUT THERE?! IT'S DANGEROUS!! OI!" You heard someone shouting, but you couldn't move,speak or anything, you could only stand there, seeing nothing, no words,no sound, unable to speak and move, paralyzed by what seems like an unknown cause, the water drifting you further and further,causing you to slowly drown.

Unable to hear the voice,unable to see, unknowing to you, that person was getting closer to you, wanting to reach you, to save you. You sank deeper, and deeper, breath left your lungs, leaving them crying for fresh air, as you consciousness slowly fadded, you felt someone holding onto you and going up due to the water currents you felt, then your consciousness went blank.

'Ah... did I really leave.... so is this what death looks like? This dark and lonely place? This endless void...' "Wake up" 'a voice..? Its calling out...? To...me? Even though... i'm already...dead?' "You're not dead yet, so wake up" 'I'm still alive? My promise... I gotta fulfill it!"

Your eyes opened, you were able to see again, white. A white place, turning your head to the side, you saw monitors, your heartbeat,blood levels and all that, turning your head slightly, you saw a sleeping figure. Trying to move your arm, you managed to move a little bit, that little movement seemed to have awaken the sleeping male. You tried to speak, but nothing came out. He rubbed his eyes, then looked at you,eyes wide, he informed a nurse who informed the doctor. He held your hand "are you alright? You were drowning and i was nearby so... sorry if i was digging my nose into your business, but i couldn't bear to watch you drown without doing anything... you just looked so sad. O-oh, and -"

He was cut off by the opening of the door, a doctor dressed in white came in with a nurse who held a notepad and pen. "Good afternoon miss (L/n), Mr. Kashitarou" you tried to speak but it hurt, your throat hurts. The nurse handed you the notepad and pen, you scribbled "water please"

You got your drink, but still unable to speak as the drug was still in your system after your 'inccident'. "Miss (Last name), take this pill once a day, it should ease your mind for a little while, but know that, even if the pills may help, only you can save yourself for good." He placed the pills on the table and you scribbled down "thank you, doctor. May i ask about the hospital bills... how do i settle them?" The doctor smiled warmly, "it's alright, miss (L/n), this young man here has settled it for you."

You looked at Kashitarou, then scribbled "why..? We only just met, you even saved my life, so why are you helping me once more?"

He gave a slight smile "because, you once saved me" "ahem" the doctor caught your attentions "sorry to disrupt this moment, but, may i speak to Mr. Kashitarou, outside?" He nodded and you were left with the nurse. You were tired so back to sleep you went.

While outside, the doctor told him "It's not a very serious case, but we need her to provide us with the information, if not, we can't do anything to help her, she's fighting her own battles that we can't help, I will refer her to a psychologist, but I'm not certain if it can save her for good. Also, i want to thank you, for saving my daughter, she knows me as a gambler but she dosn't know the truth, Itou-san, i trust that you will take care of her, tell her I'm sorry."

kashitarou's expression darkened slightly, "why don't you tell her yourself, she's your daughter, isn't she?" The doctor looked down "i just don't want her to remember those times anymore, so please, do me this favour, it's all i ask of you" he bowed his head while Kashitarou clentched his fists then lets go. "Alright, i'll tell her, i'll tell her the truth. If you can't do it, i will, i'll tell her about this shell as well." The doctor's eyes widened, he could not argue with the male, he knew what was the right choice, so he stood back up again, then walked back into the room where you were sound asleep.

For once, you did not have those nightmares anymore, you felt a warm feeling, then, a little tap woke you up from your dreams. "Time to wake up, the doctor here wants to check on you for a bit." He did some regular checks and asked you to try talking, this time, you could talk.

You felt a sense of happiness, something you haven't felt in some time. "I-I can speak a-again." Although your speech was a little stuttery, you were able to speak again, no longer in that paralyzed state.

"Alright, all's well, you can be released today" the doctor said but somehow, you felt he was hiding something, something that made you a little sad inside. You brushed it off and smiled a little.

After all the admin things were settled, Kashi offered to send you home. Not fully trusting yourself yet, you accepted.

Once you reached home, you invited Kashi in, made some tea and you both settled in. Kashi then held out the shell and gave it to you "almost forgotten to return this" you nodded "you know, this shell means alot to me, it is my momento of a special person. They were taken away from me, every week i would go to that beach just to feel like for even a moment, i could be with them again, but you know, the gone are gone, they can't come back. When i realised that, this all began happening, everytime i think of them, and wanting to go back to happy thoughts, i see darkness and felt paralyzed. It was the same as the day you found me, i saw them on the horizon, i knew it was fake, but my body moved on its own, when i turned back, everything went dark, i was paralyzed and was drowning, then i was in a silent place of darkness, falling into a bottomless pit. Nothing but loneliness..."

Your tears could no longer be kept in, it fell like a river then he held you in his arms "I didn't know you went through so much, it'll be alright, right now, let it out, all this time, you've kept it for so long, its alright now, you're not alone at this moment, i'll stay with you until you are calm." He said. You couldn't say anything and your tears never stopped either.

The shell that held your memories, washed by your tears, started to shine again.