Utaites X Reader

sou x depressed!reader

REQUESTED BY! ruirochan
Thanm you so much for requesting!

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Imagine being pulled under water, struggling to get up, struggling and gasping for air, then getting thrown into a void. Void of anything, an emptiness so great that you dont even feel it. There's nothing there, there's nothing anywhere.

There's no sound,
No movement,
No light,

Nothing. Absolutely nothing. No feelings, no thoughts, no words. Just endlessly swimming, floating and existing in this period of moving time.

Its almost as if time was standing still, yet moving at the same time.

Her eyes were glazed over in a dull colour, caught in a daze, she existed in this concept of time.

He noticed her empty stare, his heart hurt. It was painful to see the one who stole his heart, so empty, so

Dead.

Yet she was alive. She was breathing, walking, talking and smiling. An empty smile was still a smile nonetheless, a painful smile was also still a smile, just more cold, and distant.

No words can comprehend this feeling, this thing, this demon.

"Its all in your head, just stop thinking about it."

Thats what they all say. Those figures who have never experienced it, of course they see it this way, it is exactly how it looks.

"Just get over it, if you stop thinking about it, it'll go away. It's not a big deal" her friends, no, those people she knew would say. They say careless words, never thinking about the weight those words carried. Those words hurt, especially when those she called 'family' said it.

"Yea.. You're right,  it's all in my head. I'm only doing this for attention, i'm only torturing myself with my thoughts because I allow it to happen.... Yes, yes you're right... You always are... " her words left her family smiling a sad smile,  "go get some rest dear, you'll feel better tomorrow morning. Oh and make sure to eat your medicine alright" her mother said in her gentle voice.

The girl showed a small smile, "Sorry mother for what I said just now... I'll go to bed now.  Good night mother, good night father." With a hug for both her parents, she headed off to her room, the smile slowly wavering and disappearing.

As she made her way to her room, she could feel the heaviness of the demon on her back, weighing down her already burdened heart. "Guess i'll head out today, its a really starry night afterall" she whsipered to herself as she shut the room door quietly.

Grabbing a large pullover, she picked up her phone and headphones, then glanced at the  packet which contained her "happy pills". Deciding to ignore them, she Plopped on the headphones, turning on her favourite tunes composed just for her by her angel, she texted him and opened her window, ready to escape.

She peeked behind her just to make sure the coast was clear for her departure, stepped out onto her porch and made her way down the back alley cat way.

Plopping onto the soft earth below, she heard his signature whistle. A small smile crept up her features.

"Hey" his voice soft in order to not cause suspicion, "hey" her reply soft and gentle, with a tinge of emptiness.

His heart hurt, but all he could do was watch it happen.

"Sou?" She walked up to him, "you alright there?" She questioned, bringing the male back to reality. "Yea, just fine. So where shall we head to today, my princess?" He gestured a bow, causing the female to giggle slighty. "Let's head down to the lake" he nodded and reached for her hand.

She felt comfortable in his warm hands.

Their journey was short and quiet. The sounds of owls hooting and small sounds of nature here and there, accompanied by the pleasant night breeze.

Once they reached the dimly lit lake, which shone with bioluminescent lifeforms, the pair found their favourite spot and settled down, enjoying each other's presence, bringing them a comforting peacefulness.

"You know, mom and dad brought me to the psychologist today.." The girl started. The male's hand held hers gently, giving it a light squeeze for her to continue. "She gave me pills, saying they are happy pills... But really, they're just drugs which induce dopamine into my system..." Her gaze went from the glistening lake, to the starry skies,  "what does happiness mean anyway?" Her sudden question caught the male off guard.

He stayed silent for a little while, thinking of an answer, an anser which he already knew. "My happiness is... When i'm singing.. And when i'm with you" he squeezed her hand softly once again, then he felt her leaning against him.

Her breathing even, she seemed so peaceful as the starry night skies and luminescent lake seemed to adorn her feaures. She was beautiful in his eyes.

"An empty girl can never shine as beautifully as you"

He smiled lightly, knowing that she may have never heard the last part of his confession, but it was alright. He will take things slowly, to protect and cherish her, even if he could not fight her demons, he wanted to be the soft glow which protects her. Telling her that she'll never be alone even when the world is against her.

He softly sung her favourite song in attempt to wake her up so he could bring her home. "Wake up little princess, you'll catch a cold sleeping here, i'll stay with you until you fall asleep when you get home alright" his soft and warm voice brought her peace and quiet from the raging storms in her mind and troubled heart.

When she thought God had forsaken her, was when she found the angel God gave her.

Though the demons still haunt her very mind and heart, her angel is there to shield and healher wounds.

Slowly but surely, wounds will heal, she can fight again.

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Hope that was enjoyable... Somehow.... !
S

idenote: If i interpreted anything wrongly, pls do inform me... As i'm not the best person when it comes to being right about many things...

/also this was roughly based off what i'm feeling when i wrote it so yea...

/provides tissues for anyone who needs them/