Detached [h.s au]

Chapter 30: Friendship

Harry's POV

"Liam, stop assuming things," I snap. "Just tell Zayn I want to talk to him about the changes, I'm... I'm confused." I hang up before he gets the chance to reply, pocketing my phone and covering my face with my palms. I hate not knowing how to deal with feelings, they are still a rather foreign and new concept for me.

On top of all, this whole new drug shit has taken its toll on everyone, especially because we all know it's a fraud and what's behind the whole thing. Unfortunately, all of us have to be there, it's not like anyone has enough energy to argue with Zayn.

I sigh as I lean back in the chair in the backyard, lifting my gaze to the stars. I couldn't fall asleep for the life of me and I didn't want to wake Elizabeth up with my endless tossing. It's not like I care, I just know she'd ask questions and I want to avoid it at all costs.

I push up my beanie a bit, rubbing my palms together to produce some warmth. I've been restless these past few days, not only because of the constant changes but because I don't know where do I stand with Elizabeth. It was much simpler at the beginning, none of this was supposed to happen.

I wasn't supposed to kiss her, but I did. I wasn't supposed to tell her anything, but I did. I wasn't supposed to let her kiss me – more than once – but I did. I hate this. I hate what they did to me.

I rub my eyes and sigh deeply as one of the lights turns on in the house. I groan quietly and roll my eyes. She's awake, great.

"Harry?"

I glance at her, standing a few meters away from me. Her hair is an absolute mess, her pyjamas are all wrinkled, and her eyes are half open yet she somehow pulls it off. 

"Yeah?" I mutter, uninterested.

She walks toward me, folding her arms to shield herself from the cold. "Why are you sitting here at two am?"

"Why are you standing here at two am?"

She rolls her eyes, letting out a sigh. "Is everything okay?"

I frown, looking away. "Just perfect."

"Come on," she says, jerking her head toward the house. "Let's get inside and talk."

"I don't want to talk, go away," I cross my arms.

"Why not?"

"Talking annoys me, especially this late," I say. "And so do you."

"That's nice," Elizabeth says flatly and turns on her heel, walking back toward the house.

Good. I obviously allowed her to get too close, she thinks she's entitled to know everything about me when it couldn't be farther from the truth. I hate that about her, she's too pushy and too curious, but what I hate more is that I don't know how to handle it. What I don't understand is why am I following her inside when I want to be left alone?

"Can I ask you something?" I raise my voice slightly, stopping her from entering the bedroom.

She turns around hesitantly, a deep scowl on her face. "You've just said talking annoys you and now you want to talk?"

"I just..." I shrug. "Why do you care?"

"I don't understand." She lifts her eyebrow, leaning her shoulder against the doorway.

"Why are you so interested in finding out anything about me?" Series of flashbacks suddenly flash before my eyes, making me dizzy. I remember the pain and I remember the need to protect myself. To protect myself from him and his control.