goner. ;; a joshler fanfic

four

franks house wasnt to far away so we decided to walk. i felt sick to my stomach knowing josh had caught me cutting. maybe if i was lucky i could talk to frank about it. hes always been really easy to talk to and a great friend. we met in fifth grade, he was new and i quickly befriended him.

we walked silently josh and i were holding hands. i didnt know why i just felt i was better off staying inside all day. when we got to franks house gerard knocked and was almost immediately greeted with frank who had a big smile across his face.

"hey guys come in" he was talking to all of us but was looking right at gerard. as we walked in josh and gerard had dumbfounded looks on their faces. franks parents werent rich per say- but didnt care when frank would go spending a shit ton of money. the walls were lined with guitars. on one wall there were five white Epiphone Les Pauls one saying 'pansy' under the bridge. another wall hung five jackson bass guitars- im not even sure if frank knew how to play bass but damn he had a nice place. franks house was any musicians wet dream.

gerard was speechless. he walked over to a wall with four telecasters and asked frank if he could play. of course frank said yes. he set up gerard with a fender amp and handed him his personal favourtie telecaster. it was black with a white pick guard. they seemed pleased with themselves as gerard started playing one of the songs he wrote. josh and i sat on a black couch in the living room. he held my hand and looked me in the eyes.

"are you okay?"

"no" i said. then looking over at gerard and frank. gerard was singing about breaking your foot from jumping out a second floor. then after that frank picked up a les paul and sang about learning to laugh at yourself again.

i looked back at josh "good job finding frank a man, ive been trying for years. but theres something that feels right about gerard and frank"

"ferard "josh chuckled

the day went by quickly. we sat around and talked. frank and gee really hit it off. i wasnt feeling to good as blurryface started at it with the slurs as frank was playing us a song called joyriding. what can i say nothing kills a man faster than his own head. so josh took me back to his place and who knows what gee and frank did after we left.

josh knew how to take care of me. he gave me blankets, put on cartoons and made hot chocolate. this boy was a keeper although i kinna wanted to go home and turn my headphones up real loud. i felt at peace until my phone went off. my mom was calling.

"hello?"

"tyler hun when are you coming home, are you staying another night cause if you are im gonna invite your brothers over. if not, its okay ill just go visit them" lovely. making plans to leave me out, i wanted to be a better brother better son, whatever. my family really knows how to make me feel loved. i looked over at my shoulder making eye contact with josh

"im staying over tonight i dont know when ill be home tomorrow" josh smiled at that

"great! bye"

"bye i love y-" she hung up.

"woo, what shall we do tonight?" he said staring at me longingly.

it was only 8pm so we had time to kill.

"lets go on a date" i suggested

"terrific. were leaving in an hour i know just where to bring you"

i couldnt help but be curious, what did he have planned? part of me wanted it to me simple and just stay at his house and eat raw cookie dough; but i dont think thats what he had planned. but i was going to enjoy whatever it was

no youre not your gonna have a terrible time, which you deserve. youve always been a huge piece of shit if i could kill you i would. youshouldhavetakenallthepills you should be dead by now. theres no reason for your to still be alive everyday you live is another your wanted to be dead

hey so that was a pretty brief chapter and im sorry but ive been enjoying writing this and i tried as hard as possible to fit as many references to songs as possible ((one being a set it off song i dont know if anyone caught it)) but yea,