Amnesia {Book Two}

8

Depression

Ten letters.

Ten letters that might mean nothing to you. While this combination of letters formed a word I was very aware of. A word that, I felt, only I could understand.

I didn't want to wake up. I was having a much better time asleep. It was almost like a reverse nightmare, like when you wake up from a nightmare you're so relieved. I woke up into a nightmare.

I felt myself trapped in a dungeon and no matter how much I screamed no one will hear me. No one will even recognize me. As I scream, the walls press harder against my skin suffocating me further more.

I felt like there were wounds that aren't shown on my body that were deeper and more hurtful than anything that bleeds and as you look deeper into my soul, you could see the pain I'm going through.

It all started when the doctor told me about my baby. My beloved baby who is alive somewhere out there without a mother to care for him.

I hated myself so much for forgetting that I ever had a child. For not recognizing the own bruises on my body. My feelings are indescribable and mixed.

And I kept on thinking, How can a mother ever forget her child?

How can someone be so selfish to forget a piece of his own soul?
A piece of my blood and flesh.

The worst part about depression is that there is no end. You can never tell whether it begun or ended...

"Gabriella." Janie said carefully. Her hand pressed on my back as she saw me wide awake.

"Can't sleep again?" She asked and I hummed agreeing with her.

"You need to get some sleep baby. You haven't slept in a week. Either you close your eyes right now or I'll call Harry again."

"Leave me alone Janie." I muttered, my gaze never leaving the ceiling.

"Your call." I heard her say before the door slammed.

Sighing, my head was fuming from all the pain and confusion. How am I supposed to deal with this problem now? How am I supposed to find my baby?

"Gab," I heard Harry's sweet voice call, "Doing any better?"

I gave in and looked at him. His eyes were tired and his usual smile wasn't there either. Is this because of me?

"Emhm." I mumbled.

"I got you some food. Come on get up." He held my waist and helped me steady up. Then, he placed the tray over my legs.

"Not in the mood for food Harry." I looked at the food and almost gaged.

"Well, you have to eat something dear. Or else, I'll be taking you to the hospital and we both know you're not fond of hospitals." He threatened with a smile.

I rolled my eyes and opened my mouth for the fork to enter. I chewed the food and he waited for a response. When I didn't give one, he pouted.

"Oh come on! Everyone loves my pancakes Gabie." He whined, "At least give me a moan or something." He shrugged and I finally laughed.

I actually laughed.
After two weeks of depression, I laughed.

"Thank you Harry." I placed my hand over his cheek, "You are such an amazing human being. Thank you for being here for the last ten days."

"I would never leave my friends Gabriella especially when they're going through depression. I know it's hard and I actually went through it when my wife died but my friends helped me get over it and stand on my feet once again. And trust me, when you do, it would be the best feeling you could ever experience. I'm here for you till you recover."