A Single Year in the Life of a Teenager (Editing)

Week 1

05/29/16Hey people! This morning, or more like late last night, my crush texted me back. He said "Thanks". I responded with "You're welcome", because I wasn't sure what to say to that, so I just went with what made sense. Then he texted me saying he didn't want to have a relationship or anything right now, and I told him I understood. Honestly though, I don't really feel sad. Yeah, getting rejected isn't fun, but people have said worse to me. Maybe it's because he didn't say that he didn't like me or because he said he didn't want a relationship right now. Either way, I'm glad I told him. Or I think I am. Nothing has really changed since he stopped talking to me awhile ago. I'll just act normal, because there's nothing there. Let's call my ex-crush Jack. I met Jack in my Spanish class. We sat next to each other at the beginning of the school year. I saw how goofy he was and he was always trying to get my attention. At this point I'm pretty sure it was just him being nice and trying to get me involved with everyone around me. And when he got a bad grade on a test, he was actually concerned. That whole class no one could cheer him up. While I was concernedsince he was upset, it made my crush on him a little stronger. I appreciated that he didn't pretend that nothing mattered or pretended to be tough and not care when something bad happened, he actually cared. I don't feel too sad because of the way he phrased it. He surprisingly said he didn't want to let me down. Maybe he does like me, but doesn't want a relationship? So instead of telling me he likes me back, he rejected me so I didn't get hopeful? Probably not. It doesn't matter whether he likes me or not anyways, I wasn't even sure if I wanted to be in a relationship with him. At this point in time, I've still never had a boyfriend so have no clue what to do in that department. So I'm trying to just skip it. I just wanted him to know I liked him before the end of the year. I think people should know about stuff like that, to show them that there are people who exist that like them.
Now I should probably stop talking about Jack before I start crying. Well, other than Jack, today hasn't been very eventful. I texted my friends what Jack said to me but they haven't responded yet. I'll update you people later! ----------------------------Another one of my five friends has gotten back to me on their code name, so now I'll describe them. She's almost always smiling, and when she's not you know something went wrong, whether inside herself or something you did. She's crazy talented at drawing, and she likes dancing and singing too. She was born in China, and still won't say her Chinese name out loud for anyone but I call her Samm. She's a tomboy. I've known her since freshman year, and no matter how many times we fight we're still friends. She's also great at origami and can be a little crazy sometimes, but it's in a good way.So far, only Mara and Samm have said anything about me telling Jack I like him and his response. They say they're proud of me because I was brave, but I don't see how I was brave I was just being honest. They also seem more sad than I did that he wasn't interested. Maybe I'm just not letting myself be sad. I don't know anymore really. Either way, I can't focus on him. I have two tests and two quizzes Tuesday, so I need to be studying for that. Those words, the way he said it, it almost implied that he felt the same but just didn't want a relationship. I must be imagining it. I've almost been hoping that he'll ask me out or something on Tuesday. That won't happen though. He said he doesn't want a relationship so I should just move on. Liking someone who doesn't like me is a waste of time.
Today has been pretty boring. I studied a bit for Spanish. My dad has been gone all day because of work. Yeah, he has to work on Sunday. Actually, he's an Uber driver for now so he works whenever he has to. Our family (all three of us) are hoping that this will pay well enough that we can live off the money, instead of living off our diminishing savings which is what we were doing with his last job. But enough about money. That's too depressing and sorrowful. I kinda want to go outside but I think it's too hot. Plus our neighbors are having a party and I don't feel like being around people right now. And now Ashley saw the texts. She said it was brave too, but to me it was nothing. Maybe it's because I'm usually really honest (which is why some people find me rude), so telling the truth isn't very brave to me. It's my normal state. I guess for a lot of people, being honest is hard. And now Dani is calling me brave. Okay, majority rules, so I guess I'm brave. My friends can be very stubborn but that's okay. So am I. And apparently I'm brave. I'll write again later, summing up my day.----------------------------Nothing else really happened, so I guess I'm done for the day. All I did was watch Netflix. Tomorrow, I'm planning to study a bunch for so many different things. Hopefully I'll be able to get everything done. Goodnight people!
05/30/16Hey people! Today has been boring but still I'm glad I got the day off. Earlier I was texting Ashley because she was sad. I told her she was amazing (and some other motivational stuff) because it's the truth. I haven't talked to anyone else really today which is probably why I'm so bored.
I have studied for all the different tests and quizzes I have tomorrow but I don't know if I studied enough. I'm really worried about Spanish because I've been getting worse and worse in the class. Oh yeah and then my letter from the state hasn't shown up yet proving that I finished driver's ed but I'm pretty sure the school is closed so I have to wait. I guess you could say I'm a bit stressed. Thankfully, I only have two more days of school and then four finals, one each day. It's kind of getting overwhelming.Thankfully it's almost over.
My dad cooked bratwurst earlier for memorial day but he's gone now. He's driving right now, but he said he would be home in time to take me to taekwondo. Later I'm going to taekwondo to practice for our demo, so that should be fun. I'll make sure to tell you people all about it. ----------------------------Demo practice was fun. Our demo is this Saturday so we've been working really hard. We only have two more practices. Sadly, the demo is right in between my finals. I have two days of finals before it, Sunday, then two more finals after. Sounds great, right? And then I don't feel prepared at all for my tests tomorrow and I'm too tired to study. My brain won't work anymore today so I'm getting more and more stressed as the minutes go by. I don't know what to do because it seems like everything is going to drown me. Plus, I don't seem to have a break in between school and Taekwondo camps. I finish school , but then I have an ACT practice test that Wednesday, I'm going to the zoo Thursday, and then either I'm going to be at a sleepover with Mara or I'll have Friday to my self. Then on Saturday I will either be at Mara's house or at my best friends brothers' graduation party. And then the next week I start helping with Taekwondo camps. And I thought I would have time to relax. Silly me. Well anyways, I'm excited that school will be over. I'm inviting my friends to go to the zoo with me and my mom too. I hope they can go. Since it isn't the weekend anymore, I probably should go to bed because I can't make myself study anymore. Goodnight people!

05/31/16Hey people! I forgot I had a late start today so I woke up  like usual even though school didn't start for basically three hours. I was kinda annoyed about that. I got to study for the quizzes and tests I had. I think I did okay on them but I'm not sure. All of them seemed pretty easy but I don't know if that's a good thing or not. During lunch I could have sworn that I heard someone say my name and I thought I heard it from Jack's table. I guess I'm just paranoid but him and his friends seemed like they were acting differently towards me. They went up the same stairs that I did but they usually don't. I didn't talk to him but I wouldn't have anyways. We don't talk anymore. I don't really mind that we didn't talk but I felt really self conscious because I thought I heard my name. Lots of people have my first name but I thought I heard my last name too. It was probably nothing though. I probably am just making it up. It doesn't matter anyways. During Speech we got our yearbooks. I didn't look at mine until I got home.After school I took this national chemistry exam thing so I don't have to take the final now. As long as I did well on it. I think I did especially because there were some concepts we didn't talk about and she said she wouldn't have that part count for us getting exempt.  Enough about school though. Wait, never mind. School is my life. It's all that I have time to do. I even skipped Taekwondo practice to study for school. I don't understand why it's so important. The more they try to cram in our heads, the less we learn and try to understand. Most of the time at school I'm just memorizing. Not thinking or comprehending, but memorizing. My English teacher encourages us to be creative though. My teacher told us that we should always be ourselves, even in academic papers, not robots. I might not have the best grade in that class, but he's taught me more than most of my teachers. That's part of the reason I made rice crispy treats for that class. It was the only one of my classes that was having a party for the last day of classes too. Speaking of which, tomorrow is my last day of classes! Yay! Now I just have four finals to take! Doesn't that sound fun? Not. I can't wait to get out of my school this year. Once it's over, I don't have to deal with mean girls, hard teachers, or crushes. And over the summer, just like last year, I'll get over Jack. Last year, I told my crush that I liked him on the last day of finals, and then I let go of it over the course of the summer. Summer is time for a full focus on Taekwondo. Over the summer I'm going to be helping with Taekwondo camps. I'm going to be a camp counselor.
Everything seems to piling up but I will make it through, I hope. If I have gotten through finals before then I can do it again. I'll keep you people updated on everything going on, no matter how crazy it is or how little time I have. Goodnight people!

06/01/16Hey people! I had a half day today for school, so in most of my classes we didn't do anything. I forgot to ask the teacher who is in charge of yearbooks for an extra yearbook for Ashley since she wasn't at school yesterday when they were passed out. I'll try to do it tomorrow after my Spanish final. The Vocab final for today wasn't as hard as I thought it was going to be. I got it done really fast too.
After school I changed my clothes while waiting for the bus. Now before all you people get all weird on me, because of my uniform I have to wear a skirt, I wore jean shorts under it, so I just took of the skirt, and then I wear a tank top under my button down shirt, so I just put a tshirt over my tank top. And I switched my school shoes for flip flops. I felt much more comfortable that way. It was nice to go on the bus and know that no one knew what school I was from. It doesn't seem like much but it is annoying to be a walking billboard advertising my school. And I felt much more like me. Anyways, I'm about to go eat dinner and then I'll go practice the demo for Taekwondo, which is this Saturday! I'm nervous but really excited too. And the day before the demo is Ashley's birthday so yay! I"ll Keep you people updated if anything else happens.
-------------------------------I went to demo practice and I had this super bad stomach ache but I kept going anyways because I knew I had to practice since it was our last practice. Then, I messed up a bunch so I wanted to cry but I wouldn't let myself. I knew it wouldn't make anything better. Then I told Ashley and Samm about this and Ashley was telling me she was proud of me and giving me advice as if I had actually started crying. It kinda made me feel like I did something wrong instead of something right. Like she was forgiving me. Samm was just concerned and I appreciated that especially since she had already had a stressful day since her mom had a minor heart attack earlier. I calmed Samm down from having a panic attack with Ashley's help.
Ashley is  getting a puppy even though she's allergic to cats and dogs. Her doctor told her that she wasn't super allergic to dogs so she can just take allergy pills and her allergies won't act up at all. Hopefully that means that she can come over and sleepover because I have two cats. I have one cat named Kira who is a long haired black cat. No, she is not bad luck.  I have Jen who is a short haired cat with a mixture of different colors and black stripes over it. I love both of them a lot but honestly because Kira is more friendly so I like her better in someways. When I go to sleep, Kira goes under the covers with me and I get to cuddle her until I fall asleep or until she decides to leave. Whichever is sooner. Anyways, finals (Ahhh!) , and I'm feeling pretty tired so I think I'm ready to finish the day. Goodnight people!
06/02/16Hey people! Today has been pretty good. Other than my Spanish final but that was the only real bad part of today. I don't know how it went but I hope I did well enough. After that final, I hung out with Dani for a little bit but it was mostly just getting organized and getting one of her art projects. It was pretty cool but I had to leave after we got it. I went over to Samm's house to make both of us feel better. One of the highlights had to be us playing catch with a bear. As in a stuffed animal bear. And we were both laying down, so we couldn't really see where we were throwing it. It was great. We did that for a good hour at least. Samm started rolling on the floor laughing, literally. We also got pizza and went to the park. We went on the swings but since the seats were black they hurt our butts. Then we went back to her house and played sims and listened to music. I had a really great time and I think Samm did too. I also helped her with her geometry homework. I went to Taekwondo but I was late because of the bus. We sparred today in class, which is fighting except with more rules and we have protection. I also won the weapon competition that we had during class. I was really shocked that I won because I completely messed up every time. I thought it was really sweet that the color belts picked me. When I got home, not many people were around to talked to or text. I talked to Ashley about how tired I've been and she told me I might be over exercising but I don't know if I actually do. She told me not to work as hard but I don't think I can. I feel tired because of mental stress more than physical so that's why I gave my brain most of the day off, including now. I have an English final tomorrow and I'll be studying for that in the morning. My final is later in the day so I'll have time to review and stuff. I'm feeling pretty tired so I think it's time to go to bed. Goodnight people!
06/03/16Hey people! Today is Ashley's birthday! I couldn't see her in person today but I did text her happy birthday. I had my English final today and I'm not sure how I did on it. I completely forgot to look up elements of drama and so I had no clue what they were. Thankfully, it was only one part and I did the extra credit. I memorized 9 Vocab words in about the span of two hours. I just started studying them when I got to school and my final was at the second time. I know I could've gotten to school later but it seemed easier to wake up at a consistent time. After that, I talked with Dani for a little bit before she left. I talked to Mara about next year's musical and she told me she wanted to get a lead in the musical so I told her she needed to start practicing now. I hope she knew I was serious because there aren't a lot of major female roles in next year's musical. Either way, I don't mind being in the ensemble. It's just fun being a part of the drama club. The thing I would want to get a major role in would be the fall play. I love acting, and have been getting bigger roles each year. I hope I can get a good role next year but it will be tough because so many people at my school are talented. I had my last demo practice for the demos tomorrow! I'm going to be at both of them, and it's going to be so fun! I'm really excited about it and I'm not sure if I'll be able to go to sleep or not. Either way, I don't have to be at the first demo site , so I'll be good as far as sleep goes. We also got demo team uniforms, which look pretty cool. You people probably don't know what a regular uniform for Taekwondo is, but we have the blue version of that, with a cool design on the back. All I know is I hope I don't mess up. That would really suck, especially in front of people. At least I have the advantage of most people not knowing what the demo is supposed to look like, but I'll know what it's supposed to look like. I should at this point. Oh and today is bi pride day! For all those who are bi, you are awesome and amazing and you are bi not half straight and half gay you are completely bi! Whether or not you've come out, no matter what, if you identify as bi you are bi and that's perfectly fine! You people are amazing and keep being you!Goodnight people!
06/04/16Hey people! Too tired to write. I'll talk to you people tomorrow. Goodnight people!