A Single Year in the Life of a Teenager (Editing)

Week 30 (Unedited)

12/18/16Hey people! Today was mostly filled with  homework more than anything else. I did my homework in the morning, then  I watched shows with my dad. I like watching shows with my dad. It's  really relaxing and a nice thing to bond over. We'll memorize movies  like the backs of our hands, and quote movies all the time and know  which movie it's from. It's really fun and it makes me happy to have  that's with my dad. Later  in the day, we had a potluck meeting for drama for our musical. It was  so fun to see everyone, and I got to sit with Mara and hang out with the  drama cast. I love all of them so much and I don't think they know  that. I don't know if I would want to be at my school without them.  They're all so kind and understanding and I can ask any of them for a  hug and they'll be there to give me one. They'll be there to make me  laugh, to smile with me, talk with me, be crazy with me, or just sit  with me. I'm glad I know all of them. Sadly, every time I see them now I  think of how the seniors will be gone soon. I know that there's still a  half year left but it's still not that long. I should probably get some sleep so goodnight people!12/19/16Hey  people! Today it was so cold that my mom actually asked my dad to give  me a ride to school today. It was really weird, but I didn't mind very  much, and neither did he. I got to school earlier because of that, which  was pretty lucky since I had to do some stuff in the morning. I had to  print out a paper, and take an extra credit quiz for Spanish. I think I  did well on it, or at least I hope so. During  the day was pretty calm, I only have a few tests and quizzes before  break, and none if them are on Wednesday so I think I'll be good. I hope  I can hold out and not get too stressed out before break comes. I'm so  close, but I feel so over my head in all honestly. But, I guess those  are the dangers of junior year. Hopefully it won't actually be very bad.  But I think it might get worse, seeing as drama practice, and ACT prep  starts in or around January, and poetry club will be amping up so I  don't know how timing is going to go. I can just hope for the best and  keep my grades up. I'm glad I got to relax a bit today.  Hopefully I'll continue that pattern, and I'll start to study for finals  (which my school has after break). I just hope the finals are not too  hard. Well, now I would like to sleep since I have time to. Goodnight  people!12/20/16Hey people! Today  was the last full day of school in the year 2016! I'm very happy and  very excited about it. Tomorrow I have a half day, and I might go buy my  friend a gift since she told me she bought me a gift. I just hope that I  can make it a thoughtful one. I don't really buy presents often (before  high school I didn't get presents from my friends for holidays like  Christmas) so I don't know what counts as a thoughtful gift and stuff  like that. School  wasn't very interesting or tough today, which was actually pretty nice.  I honestly can't wait until break, but even during break I seem to be  busy. I hope that I have time and make time to study for finals. It's  going to be tough with the holidays and trying to celebrate with my  friends, but hopefully I will be successful in studying and do well on  my finals. I also have a few tests before finals but after break, but  I'm not too worried. As long as I study, it should be fine. While  I'm looking forward to Christmas, I'm not actually looking forward to  Christmas Day. My grandparents on my dad's side are somewhat sexist, or  some of their comments are. I know it was a different time that they  grew up in, but it still aggravates me, and my mom is annoyed by it too  so it's not like she defends them. My dad doesn't completely defend them  either. I just hope they don't say anything out of line, especially  since I'm ace it's a bit harder to stay exactly neutral to the whole  thing. I just hope that it goes okay. I  actually celebrate Christmas on Christmas Eve with my parents and my  grandma on my mom's side. That's usually pretty nice, and I'll get to  see my parents open their presents that I got them. I'm really happy and  proud that I could buy them presents. I just hope they like them.  I  think they will, but I just don't know for sure. Well, I'll have to wait to find out. I should sleep now, before my last day of school for the year. Goodnight people!12/21/16Hey  people! Today was pretty fun. I wore my Nightmare Before Christmas  sweater for my Christmas accessory (since we were allowed to wear  Christmas accessories) and none of my teachers made me take it off. One  girl in my APES class said it wasn't a Christmas sweater, until I  explained where it was from. Then she accepted it. Either way, I'm glad I  got to wear it. I also got a lot of chocolate today. Two different  freshman offered me chocolate and they were both so sweet and nice about  it. It made me really happy since they cared enough to give me  something, even if it was just chocolate and just because they saw me. We  had shorter classes, so after school I had been planning to go have  lunch, but I wasn't hungry because I had been eating chocolate the whole  day. I just decided to go home since Mara couldn't see the movie with  me today. Sadly, we weren't able to reschedule it. Samm asked me if I  could hang out for a bit, and so I might do that tomorrow. I  hope Ashley is okay. She's been going through a lot recently, and  realizing a lot of stuff. I just hope that she's okay. I hope she (and  the rest of my friends) know that they are wonderful and amazing and  that I love her (and the rest) a lot. I'm not even sure if I'm helping  her feel better or not, all I know is that her being sad is making me  sad too. I just want her to be okay. I should go to sleep, and I will once I know Ashley is okay... or at least is going to sleep. Goodnight people!12/22/16Hey  people. I had some fun today and hung out with Samm and one of her  friends. I was happy that I got to see her. I missed her. I'm glad that  we could enjoy some time together, and that we're still friends. After  that, I felt worse. Not because of Samm. So many of my friends are so  happy and excited about Christmas, and I'm just not. I like Christmas,  but this year it just doesn't feel right. And what feels worse is that I  don't think I should say anything to anyone because I would make them  feel bad and I don't want to ruin it for them. Today, I just haven't  been feeling very good. But I can't tell my friends because it will  bring their Christmas spirit down.Even  when Taekwondo came around, I wasn't even looking forward to that. I  always love going there. Today, I didn't want to. I went anyway. It  wasn't very much fun, and while I felt slightly better, it still wasn't  right. It was super weird. Plus I got a headache while I was there,  which didn't help. I  feel a bit better after watching a movie with my dad. I'm still kind  down, but not as much as before. I'm not even looking forward to making  cookies with my grandma tomorrow. I don't know what's wrong with me. And  even if I didn't mind brining my friends' spirit down so that I won't  be sad, my friends have their own problems which have been worse  recently. So I guess I'll just fix it on my own. It'll be easier that  way.  I guess I'll go to bed. Night people.12/23/16Hey  people. Today started well. I went to my grandma's house to make  cookies and it was very fun. I had fun with my grandma and my aunt. We  made sugar cookies and frosted them. I was really glad to spend time  with them especially since I've felt so tense recently. Sadly  my relaxedness did not last. When I got home, Ashley apparently felt  rejected since no one saw her leaving the group chat. I wasn't even  home, and felt kinda pissed at her, so I used some inappropriate  language to tell her to leave me alone. She got mad that I swore at her  and said she deserved more respect than that. She told me not to talk to  her unless I apologized and I did. Because I was upset I said basically  "sorry for being a horrible person". I started ignoring my iPad because  I didn't want to deal with it, but after a movie I went back to it.  Ashley thought I was going to kill myself. I don't even have anything in  my house that I could kill myself with. Or if I do I don't think about  it enough to realize it. We started trying to express our feelings but  honestly I still feel like crap and that even though she says that she  was "raised to believe she deserved respect" and that's not what I was  taught even if people have some sort of inherent respect that should be  given real respect is earned for me.Well I guess I'll just  continue to feel like crap instead of feeling better after today. I  guess I should maybe stop trying to be happy. It might be easier.  Goodnight people.12/24/16Hey  people! Today was pretty nice, seeing as I got to sleep in a bit, and I  didn't have Taekwondo in the morning. Taekwondo was closed because of  Christmas and Christmas Eve. I did have to do a bit of last minute  shopping for our Christmas Eve dinner. My mom didn't have something, so  we had to go get it. It wasn't too bad though. In  my family, we celebrate Christmas on Christmas Eve (as in opening  presents and a big meal and reading the Bible story) because we go see  my dad's parents on Christmas Day. That's why I was more excited today  than for tomorrow. Well, kind of. I was excited for my parents to open  their gifts, but it's not like I was seeing anyone that I haven't seen  in a very long time. I guess I'm kind of lucky that way. When  Christmas Eve dinner arrived, it was very delicious. We had ham with  apple butter glaze, broccoli with a cashew sauce (which I didn't hate  but didn't love) and garlic mashed potatoes. My dad ate downstairs and  my mom and I ate upstairs. After finishing dinner, we waited a bit  before starting on dessert, which was baked apples with cinnamon and  butter inside. My  grandma on my mom's side (who I made cookies with yesterday) came to  exchange presents with us, and had dessert with us too. The baked apples  were very tasty and wonderfully sweet. Then  it was time to open presents. From a family at Taekwondo I had gotten  an awesome t-shirt which reads "Beauty, Brains and A Black Belt. Any  Questions?" I absolutely love it because it is an awesome shirt. I got a  Girl Genius shirt with Agatha on it saying "It is a glorious day for  science!" from my parents and I loved it too. My grandma got me a Cubs  mason jar and money so that was pretty awesome. I also got Pokémon Moon  from my dad, which I was expecting since I had said I wanted it when my  dad asked and later that week there were two boxes which looked like  they could be DS games. My dad got himself Pokémon Sun. When  my mom opened her present (which for a reminder was a David Bowie  t-shirt) and once she recognized it she had a huge smile on her face. My  dad also smiled when he saw that I got him slippers. He appreciated  that they were memory foam, and then replaced his old slippers with the  new ones. My parents got my grandma a spice set which she appreciated.  We (my parents) got our family a popcorn maker in the shape of R2D2. We  already knew what it was, but since the last few years there hasn't been  anything under the tree, we wanted thee to be bunches of presents. I  know people always say that Christmas isn't about the gifts but it's  still something that people give each other around Christmas so it's  still a nice part. I was very happy with what I got, especially since  for the last few years I haven't been expecting anything at all, and  haven't received much from my parents (because of money issues). It was  nice to see all those presents, because it meant that we weren't so  utterly and totally broke so much that we couldn't even get small  presents. I  want to give a Merry Christmas to all those who celebrate Christmas, a  Happy Hanukkah to those who celebrate Hanukkah and a Happy Kwanza for  those who celebrate Kwanza. All of you are individuals whose holidays  should be respected and people should be allowed to celebrate whatever  they wish to around this time of year and every other time of year. I  think this has been my longest post in awhile, but sadly it must come  to an end. Tomorrow I'll go to Wisconsin and see my grandparents and my  aunt and my cousins. Hopefully nothing bad will happen. Goodnight  people!