A Malfoy

29

~ Chapter Twenty Nine: Arguing fire upon fire ~

After corresponding with Thomas Black, we had become slightly more than acquaintances. Draco had said he didn't trust him, but I thought Thomas really was trying to help. The more we talked, the more I was starting to become persuaded. Maybe it would be good if I did go back in time, somehow stopped Voldemort before he became evil. If there ever was a time...

A pickle made its' way over onto my nose, sliming my cheek before it fell. I let out a sigh of disgust before wiping off my cheek and looking up. "Again?"

Carter grinned. For lunch, as much as I wanted to be alone to think, Draco had talked me into sitting with him for the half hour. Naturally, his best friend showed up as well. I only wished mine were here as well, but I no longer knew who that was.

"Of course, Amme. I had to get your attention somehow," he said.

Both Draco and I turn to look at him curiously. He spoke. "'Amme'?"

"Well, yeah, mate. It's her name spelled backwards. It's like Amy, but said with me. Clever, right?" Hope fluttered in his eyes.

I shook my head and munched on a brownie. Having mentioned cleverness, I looked over and saw Hermione sitting at the main Gryffindor table. Lucas and Charlotte were next to her. Though I couldn't hear their conversation, I assumed it was about the exams we were taking next week, most of which would determine our final grades before graduation. I wanted to be over there with them, where I could lie and say I was tired, before heading off to the dorms.

"No, not really," Draco said, looking away from his friend and focusing on me. He lowered his voice. "Hey, how are you doing, Em?"

"I just need some rest," I flashed a small, insincere smile, and stood up quietly.

Once again, his eyes flashed concern. I didn't want him to worry about me. Worrying wouldn't do good for him or for anyone. This was just a thing I was going through, something that would take me time to work through. My mother's dead, father's missing, and suddenly, I have no idea what I want to do with my life.

"Em-" He protested and began to stand up when I placed a hand on his shoulder.

"It's alright; I'm just going to get some sleep," I told him quietly, already taking a step away.

"Emma, I didn't mean to offend or upset you," said Carter.

Two steps back and already feeling nervous, I smiled again but it wavered. My eyes flashed between the two guys. I know they're just trying to help, but there's nothing to help with. I'll just make everything awkward and silent.

"You didn't. I'm sorry. I'm just not feeling very well; I'll see you two later," I said in a rush, swallowing, before hurrying away.

Back in the Gryffindor common rooms, I laid down on a couch and wrapped a blanket around my shoulders. There was a large box television in front of the wall which was off. I was somewhat surprised to take notice of the lack of people in the large and spread room. Usually this place was filled with Gryffindors and a few strays.

However, it was numbing to realize the amount of people that had died. It was probably hundreds. Fred, Colin, Nigel, Lavender, Mr Lupin and his wife, Maryann, my mom... Those were just the people I was acquainted with. I felt my breath go ragged and tried to bite down as my hands began to shake. I attempted to swallow but was unable to as I sat, feeling as if the world was closing in on me. I squeezed my eyes shut. My family is gone. The images through my eighteen years slowly trailed into a timeline in my head.