Part of Your World:A Chris Evans FanFiction

29.

 The two weeks were over too early and soon I was back in LA again. I did feel much more calm and relaxed though. Still lonely, sure. But in a much better head space. I started spending weeks at a time camping out in Joshua Tree by myself. With a big bag load of GPS tracking equipment to track the coyote I'd been tagging on previous trips out with the rangers. I was observing some fascinating behaviour from the animals that I hadn't expected, along with some interesting prey interactions and I would go home and devise ways to test a few theories I had without adding too much to my data collection. I had some good future paper ideas.

Chris called me one morning excited out of his mind. Carly had had her baby. A little boy named Ethan, and he sent me a text with a photo of him holding the little bundle looking about as proud as an uncle could be. It made me insanely clucky seeing him like that. My mind raced with visions of him with his own children in the future.

I still was barely seeing Gaby. I was actually really starting to worry about her. I sent her messages daily telling her I was always here. If I saw her alone at work I made sure she knew, I was always available for her. I wouldn't let that shit head gaslight her. He wouldn't chase me off. I continued going to the role playing group. I noticed I wasn't really a welcome edition by most people. A couple of the other girls always welcomed me warmly, but most of the guys there were really cold towards me. I assumed most of that was Richard. Richard however was always over the top welcoming, while making a lot of snide and derogatory little jabs at me. If I ever said anything about it, he'd laugh it off like I couldn't take a joke. I refused to let it get to me. Gaby though. Gaby was losing weight in an alarming way. She also started dressing in a way that was not her at all. That was getting to me.

As I had promised I started seeing a therapist. It didn't come naturally to me, talking to strangers. I mean I could fake it. I'd gotten good at faking it. On occasion, like what happened with Chris and Gaby and a few other people in my past, I felt an immediate and overwhelming connection with a person and I would open up to them immediately. Otherwise, it was a slow burn to earn my openness. It took time, and effort. Yet here I was, paying someone obscene amounts of money to spend an hour a week talking to them. Thank god for a decent health care plan.

My therapist told me to try and start getting involved with more social events. Meet more people and all that.

It was getting towards the end of April and I still hadn't actually taken his advice seriously at all. If anything I'd pulled away from people a little more. I decided to go into University to see if the stupid boys were at the library so I could score some pot. I ran in, dressed in my usual shorts and purple sports bra running outfit. It was already getting really hot in LA. I reached the side of library, and I saw the boys, flipping off fence railings, clambering up walk ways. I ran to them, jumping up on the railing running down the side of the stairs, as I reached the end of the rail I took two steps up the side of the wall and did a forward flip, landing in the midst of the group.

"Hey there's our favourite, try hard chick." One of the boys said. I think his name was Adam. Maybe Allen. I wasn't sure. He was a tall, well built white guy, with dark brown hair. He looked like how the captain of the football team looks in teen movies. "We haven't seen you around for a while. Where ya been?"

"Hello, stupid boys." I said, stretching my arms up above my head. "I don't really have much reason to come in at the moment. Nice to know I was missed."

"What do you mean you have no reason to come in? Did you graduate?" One of the younger of the group asked, he was about my height, and lean with a dark brown complexion.