1984 - A David Bowie Fanfic.

Nightmare before Christmas.

It's crowded, too many people stand in my way from escaping my fate. I scream, but no one looks at me, as if I'm invisible to them. I can't move! Where's David?! The boys?! My vision blurs and soon I see Kevin with a gun and I hear the shot boom in my ears.

I jolt awake and see David drinking water from a plastic bottle, he squeezes it again, and then I realise that's the noise I heard in my dream, was not a shot gun but just a water bottle. I shudder and hide under my duvet a little more, scared about my nightmare.

"Good morning Ros!" David calls cheerfully.

I release heavy breaths, my eyes squinting and my hands become clammy.

"Where am I?" I breathe still in shock.

David chuckles, but when I look at him he looks a little startled. "Darling? You're home. With me and the boys, it's December 22nd... Did you have a bad dream?"

Yes.

"No." I lie coldly. "Just a little dazed." I whisper briskly.

"What are your plans for today?" David asks as I manage to get out of bed.

I stand still on my feet for a moment, trying to steady myself, hoping I don't stumble.

I have to see El. I need to tell her about that nightmare.

"I'm seeing El and the baby today, to give our presents to her." I mutter a white lie. It was true, partly. I did have presents for her that needed delivering, and I hadn't seen the baby since he was born, but I had to ask her about Kev.

"I'll take the boys out I think, they say heavy snow today." David says peering out the window, letting a chilling draft in.

"Don't say that." I bite. "We need descent weather for the concert."

"My little Rebel," David smirks. "Our tickets sold out within days, no matter the weather, they'll still come."

***

Once in my woolly jumper, maternity jeans, and the warmest coat I had ever bought, I grabbed my car keys.

"Right I'm off!" I shout so all my boys could hear.

"Last minute Christmas shopping are we Ros?" Zowie is the first to appear.

"I'm an organised woman thank you very much, Father Christmas will be very disappointed to know that-"

"Yeah, don't try that on me." Zowie smiles and I wink.

"You off already Blue Jean?" David asks holding a crumpled newspaper under his armpit and a cigarette in hand.

"Yes, and anyway, I need to go to the concert grounds to check on last minute things."

"I could meet you there?" David offers.

"Who'd look after the kids?" I ask back.

David says nothing and I just shrug. The dream made me feel as if I were in a nasty mood - it was dreadful treating my family like this! The threat still hung over me, everyday it became more frightening to leave the house, to know Kevin could be around any corner.

***

I knocked loudly, aggressively, nervously. El rushed to my aid and invited me in without question.

"I guess I don't need to ask why you're here." El mutters quietly.

"Actually, I bring gifts." I hold her neatly wrapped present in front of her.

"Thank you!" She whispers happily.

"Where's Oliver?" I ask looking around for the tiny baby.

"He's asleep, thankfully." She sighs in relief.

"I had a nightmare."

"Did it involve my husband by any chance?" El asks stiffly.

"Yes."

"What was it."

"He shot me, in a crowded space." I whisper.

El huffs. "He's still in prison Ros, and besides, I think he cares more about Oliver more than the idea of killing you."

"Yes, I understand that, but he could still want revenge on me! I got him arrested! He knew David was the father to my first child!"

"Ros, if he had a real plan to kill you, he would've told me. I'm his wife, I'd be the first to know."

"No Eleanor. You wouldn't."

"Excuse me?!" She raises her voice angrily.

"You really think he'd tell you? Knowing that we're best mates? He knows you can't keep the secret, he knows you'd tell me his plan, you'd try to help me!" I pause. "At least, I hope you would."

"You're playing that card? The, 'choose me or your husband' card? You sink low Rosalind Chester."

"I'm not making you choose!" I growl.

She paused and sighs heavily. "I do love him."

"I know that."

"But I wouldn't let him hurt you. If I knew anything Ros, I'd tell you! But I honestly don't know! He seems so smitten with Oliver when we go to visit him, I don't see why he'd want revenge now?"

"Because it's taken him 10 years to have a child of his own, he won't see his child grow up... And it's my fault."

"Not all of your fault. He shouldn't have murdered." Ellen says inhaling sharply. "Ros, you're over thinking this. He can't get out!"

El takes a deep breath and sighs. "It's Christmas Ros, you're planning a concert, go and enjoy this. Enjoy the fact David's here, you have all three boys now, and you're expecting another one in the next few months!"

I nod, she was right, this was a perfect chance to celebrate. "Come over for Christmas lunch on Thursday, bring Oliver, it would be good for you to come out and see the boys."

"Yeah I think I'll do that, thank you." El smiles.

"Right I better go, things to sort..." I say and begin to walk towards the door.

"Ros, please don't worry. Enjoy the last few days of 1984, won't you?" El says trying to be positive.

A part of my head told me to take Ellen's advice and just forget what Kevin threatened me, but the other part was screaming at me saying he really could be out to get me...